


Code Blue

by useumssi



Category: ATEEZ (Band)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Be Gentle With Me, Blow Jobs, Consent, Eventual Smut, Hand Jobs, M/M, Manipulation, Not Beta Read, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Overstimulation, Pet Names, Strong Language, Unprotected Sex, Woosan, seongjoong, very poorly written angst, we love consent in this household, wear a glove before you make love people
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-09
Updated: 2020-08-20
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:41:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 28,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21728452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/useumssi/pseuds/useumssi
Summary: Hongjoong is a nurse.Seonghwa is a doctor.San is an asshole.That is all.
Relationships: Kim Hongjoong/Park Seonghwa
Comments: 36
Kudos: 217





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by my friend who said "Grey's Anatomy but make it ATEEZ".  
> Enjoy (シ_ _)シ

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all and ty for clicking on this! I hope you enjoy!  
> Just as a reminder, this fic was originally posted in Dec 2019 but I've gone back and done some editing, so if you've read this before and come back, the main difference is this: they are no longer residents.  
> I've changed their designation to interns, but everything else is pretty much the same! (I also have no idea how internships work so I'm pulling most of this stuff outta my ass OTL)  
> Enjoy~

“There’s a full moon tonight,” Wooyoung muses from across the nursing station, lounging in his chair and tapping his pen against the armrest.

Working graveyard shifts were never fun; they were exhausting and caffeine fueled. Oftentimes Wooyoung left work the next morning in a daze and arrived at his apartment without even registering fully how he got home.

Combine a graveyard shift with a full moon and something was _bound_ to go wrong.

See, nurses have this belief that full moons brought more patients into the emergency room, most with unusual symptoms that took way too long to decipher. And Wooyoung has seen some truly unusual things in his time working here.

Severed limbs, rare bug bites, worms in places that worms shouldn’t be; you name it, he’s seen it.

At the very least, he always has interesting stories to tell at parties.

Hongjoong has probably seen worse, having worked here two years longer than Wooyoung. The man in question sits close to reception, an endless pile of paperwork looming over him, as was the duty of the charge nurse. He merely hums at Wooyoung’s observation, barely glancing up from the doctor’s order he is attempting to decode to glance at the ghost town of uncomfortable chairs and outdated magazines, separated from them by glass sliding doors.

It’s true, the waiting room is strangely quiet even in Hongjoong’s opinion. He takes it as a little blessing. There are no panicking mother’s demanding that he assess their child, no paramedics rushing in with a deteriorating patient on a stretcher; there is _nothing_. It is somewhat eerie to him. The ER waiting room is always bustling with people, and having it so empty now set off an uncomfortable gnawing in his stomach.

It felt like the calm before the storm.

And storm it did.

ooooo

A bleary-eyed Hongjoong shuffles back to the nursing station from the break room, a scratchy hospital blanket wrapped around his shoulders and torso. He had fallen into a dead sleep during his hour-long break, and being jolted out of REM by his incessant alarm was not a particularly pleasant way to be woken up.

“How’s it going?” he rests his hand on Wooyoung’s shoulder, standing behind the man and leaning against the back of his chair. His voice is still rough from sleep, and his cropped midnight blue hair sticks straight out in several places all over his head.

Wooyoung leans back in his chair, jostling Hongjoong. “Nothing to report,” he replies. “Just finishing up some documentation. ICU called to confirm some information about the stroke patient we sent them earlier, but that was pretty much it. The patients in room 7 and 9 are sleeping well, vitals are stable. Doc says day shift can discharge them after final bloodwork.”

Wooyoung sighs through his nose heavily, running a hand through his silvery blonde hair.

Hongjoong nods to no one in particular, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. The digital clock glares at him in hues of red from above the nursing station.

 _3:15am_. 4 more hours to go.

Hongjoong receives report from another nurse before bidding her a good break and dragging a chair over to where Wooyoung is seated. He plops himself down, the worn chair hissing as the seat deflates under his weight, and wraps his blanket around the two of them. He rests his head against Wooyoung’s shoulder, eyes closing involuntarily from fatigue.

“Oh, hyung, I forgot to tell you,” Wooyoung starts, voice barely a whisper in the dead silence of the room. Hongjoong hums, shifting slightly but still not opening his eyes.

“Doctor Min said he’d be by later, maybe around 4. He has some new emergency medicine interns joining him and he said he wants to get them oriented to the floor,” Wooyoung mumbles, leaning his own head against Hongjoong’s.

Hongjoong hums again. He often works with Dr. Min. The man is smart, kind and truly passionate about his work, unlike some of the other cocky bastards that he’s had the displeasure of meeting during his time here. Doctors who think it’s their way or the highway are unbearable to work with. They talk down to him and the other nurses, yelling at him for things that were not his fault, and all he could do is take it because of the _stupid_ seniority system.

He just hopes that Dr. Min’s golden personality rubs off on the new interns. They could use more doctors that aren’t completely insufferable.

He and Wooyoung doze like that, not quite asleep but not quite awake either, the red numbers on the clock unknowingly getting closer and closer to 4 o’clock. The ER remains quiet.

That is, until, the IV pump from room 5 starts screaming bloody murder.

The two nurses jump at the sound, Wooyoung groaning when he realizes it’s his patient that’s causing the disturbance.

“Shit,” he grumbles under his breath. “I thought I replaced the bag. Hyung, do you mind getting me a liter of normal saline? I’m just gonna go reset the pump and check the IV site.”

“Do I have to?” Hongjoong whines, eyelids feeling like deadweights on his face. He can see enough to observe Wooyoung standing above him with his lip jutting out in the most adorable pout and, ugh, _why_ is he such a pushover?

“Fine, I’ll meet you in there,” Hongjoong concedes, although none too happily. Wooyoung smiles at him cheekily, the apples of his rosy cheeks squeezing his eyes shut in one of the most manipulative eye smiles that Hongjoong has ever had the misfortune of encountering.

He loves his dongsaeng, he really does.

But he loves sleep more.

The two of them trudge off in opposite directions, Wooyoung toward the still-beeping IV machine and Hongjoong toward the supply room. He quickly grabs what Wooyoung requested, as well as a new line, because why not?

The two set up the bag and the line (even though it’s really a one-person job), the patient in question glancing at them dazedly before drifting back off to sleep. Oh, how Hongjoong envies him.

The red clock reads 4:03 when the storm hits.

The ER doors slide open with a quiet _whoosh_ , capturing the attention of the two nurses who have just returned to the nursing station. The visage of Dr. Min peers around the door and Hongjoong’s heart can’t help but warm at the sight of the man.

“Ah, Hongjoong! I was hoping you’d be working tonight,” Dr. Min beams at him as Hongjoong bows to him.

“Dr. Min, it’s nice to see you again! This is my colleague, Wooyoung. I believe you have worked with him a couple of times as well,” Hongjoong smiles widely as he gestures to Wooyoung standing behind him.

The man is staring beyond Dr. Min, mouth slightly agape and cheeks coloured a bright red. It is only when Hongjoong nudges him slightly that Wooyoung snaps back to reality and bows deeply to Dr. Min.

“Yes, I have worked with him! In fact, I saw him just last week when he identified a case of acute appendicitis. Made my job so much easier,” Dr. Min winks at Wooyoung, who somehow blushes _even more_ and shuffles to the side until Hongjoong’s tiny body is shielding him from the doctor’s praise.

“It was nothing,” Wooyoung whispers shyly.

“No, no,” the doctor waves his hands around, all too energetic for four in the morning. “Any longer and we would’ve been dealing with a ruptured appendix. And this is why we work closely with the nurses, especially such keen ones who can really help make our job easier and facilitate better patient care.”

The doctor whirls around, arms still flapping around wildly and gesturing toward Hongjoong and Wooyoung. Hongjoong’s brows furrow in confusion.

He is _this close_ to asking the doctor to sit down and have a drink of water when the storm comes walking in the door.

Or rather, storms.

Three new interns. Three new _gorgeous_ interns.

One is tall, with blonde hair and dark roots, the apples of his cheeks dusted with the subtlest pink. His shoulders are so wide that the white lab coat he’s wearing strains against him in all the right places. He absolutely knocks the wind out of Hongjoong’s lungs with the force of a tornado.

The one that follows is shorter- but definitely still taller than Hongjoong- with jet black hair and some grey peeking out from under his baby mullet. _Damn Hongjoong misses his mullet_.

This man has sharp, cunning eyes and beautifully full, pink lips drawn up into a smirk. He is striking, setting off sparks wherever his eyes roam Hongjoong’s body like a lightning storm.

The last man is _breath-taking_ . He is tall, but not as tall as the first resident. His hair is swept up into a perfect coif that makes Hongjoong uncomfortably aware of the cowlicks adorning his head. The shaved sides of his undercut make Hongjoong’s mouth positively _water_. The man has sun-kissed skin and a beautiful body; even under his scrubs, it is easy to see the outline of his long legs and small waist. Hongjoong watches as his tongue darts out and wets his bottom lip in a fashion that can only be described as obscene, and when Hongjoong raises his gaze to the eyes of the mysterious third resident-

Oh boy.

His eyes are stunning, and they knock Hongjoong’s feet from under him with the force of a raging typhoon. His body unknowingly begins to quiver and he can feel his heart beating wildly in his chest. He can’t breathe; he’s _drowning._

Hongjoong barely registers Dr. Min prompting the interns to introduce themselves.

Jeong Yunho.

Choi San.

 _Park Seonghwa_. 

ooooo

As per usual, Hongjoong and Wooyoung wander out of the emergency room after their shift in a dream-like state, but for an entirely different reason than the exhaustion that occurs after a 12-hour night shift.

They shuffle quietly to the staff parking lot, knapsacks swinging loosely from their shoulders. Hongjoong reaches his car- a beat-up Honda Civic- and unlocks it before slinging his bag into the back and sliding into the driver’s seat. Wooyoung climbs into the passenger’s side and stares blankly at the windshield.

Too tired to argue with the man, Hongjoong can only grumble, “Woo, this is my car.”

“Yeah, I know hyung. I just need a moment to process what the _fuck_ happened tonight.” Wooyoung’s head audibly _thumps_ against the headrest. Hongjoong’s lips quirk up in the corners against his will at the younger man’s crisis.

To be fair, the interns, or rather one intern in particular, gave Wooyoung a run for his money in terms of shamelessness.

Hongjoong has gone to parties with his friend on more than one occasion, and to say that Wooyoung is fearless would be an understatement. He is a complete social butterfly, flirting with anyone who shows even an inkling of interest in him.

Wooyoung plus alcohol? That was even worse. The man is a sex fiend when alcohol is involved. Hongjoong never saw him leave a club without making out with at least two people and possibly participating in a field trip to the bathroom, which he often left with a grin to rival the Cheshire cat.

Jung Wooyoung may have met his match in Choi San.

The man was relentless, immediately pouncing on Wooyoung the moment Dr. Min left them to get acquainted. It was _supposed_ to be a quiet meet-and-greet and orientation to the floor, but it turned into a flirt fest with Hongjoong and the other nurses left as a very uncomfortable audience.

The other interns were slightly better, following Hongjoong through the unit, earnestly noting the utility and supply rooms, the location of the crash cart as well as the general set-up of the nursing station.

Hongjoong would like to think that he was cool as a cucumber as he led Yunho and Seonghwa around, but the fact remains that his heart was beating out of his chest and his voice may have cracked more than once from how dry his mouth had become. The two doctors listened attentively, asking questions here and there and Hongjoong truly did his best to answer without seeming like a belligerent idiot.

But it was really fucking _hard_ when Park Seonghwa looked at him with his deep, chocolate eyes and pinned him into place, turning his tongue into lead and his limbs into cinder blocks. The man’s beautiful eyebrow- _oh dear lord, he was in deep_ \- quirked in interest at whatever Hongjoong had to say, and he hummed softly as Hongjoong gave them the tour.

 _Even his voice is beautiful_.

The tour around the unit didn’t take more than 15 minutes, but it felt like a lifetime to Hongjoong. By the end of it, Hongjoong was sweating and silently praying that Dr. Min would return and save him from the intimidatingly good-looking interns so he could get back to work (read: _sleep_ ) and possibly fantasize about a certain doctor.

When they returned to the nursing station, San had effectively cornered Wooyoung. He was standing over him, moving so close that Wooyoung had to roll back the chair he was seated on until he was pressed against the desk behind him. A bright pink blush coloured his cheeks and ears, and San had a shit-eating grin on his face as he leaned down and placed his hands on Wooyoung’s armrests, caging the man in.

A panicked glance in his general direction was all it took for Hongjoong to jump into protective hyung mode. He sidled up next to San and grabbed the back of Wooyoung’s chair, turning it slightly so San lost his grip and stood up straight.

“Dr. Choi,” Hongjoong smiled brightly at him- too bright to be genuine. “Since you missed the first tour, how about I give you a quick one right now. I’m sure Nurse Jung has some work to finish up, so let’s leave him to it.”

He walked past the man, not really giving him time to reply, or a _choice_ for that matter. After about five seconds, he heard the patter of San’s shoes behind him, preceded by an almost inaudible squeak from Wooyoung.

 _Oh boy_.

They do a quick walk through the nursing station situated in the center, with 10 patient rooms circling the unit. They walk past the crash cart and med room, which are located in a little hallway just off to the right side of the unit. The break room is located at the very end, Hongjoong and the doctor just barely stepping inside before-

“So, Nurse Jung,” San drawls. “Wooyoung. He single?”

Hongjoong choked on his own saliva almost immediately, launching into a coughing fit as San leans back against the door of the room, crossing his arms and not making a single move to help him.

 _Asshole_.

Hongjoong hobbled to the sink and grabbed a worn mug before downing an entire glass of lukewarm water, the cocky bastard in the corner just watching him the whole time. He cleared his throat before deigning to answer.

“Dr. Choi, don’t you think that’s a little inappropriate?” Hongjoong turned back to face the resident, raising his gaze to match San’s.

He merely shrugged in response. “Hardly. We’re both adults, and I like what I see.”

The intern has the audacity to smirk and Hongjoong is so taken aback that he can barely formulate a response before he’s staring at his retreating back. He placed his mug down none too gently before speed-walking to catch up with San, whirling around in front of him and backing him against the wall.

“Damn Nurse Kim, if you’re interested, all you have to do is say so,” San said, stepping way too far into Hongjoong’s personal bubble and craning his neck to meet Hongjoong’s height. He doesn’t want to concede, he really _doesn’t_ , but Hongjoong couldn’t help but step back at the man’s blatant violation of his personal space.

“Listen, San,” the resident’s eyebrow cocks at Hongjoong’s use of informal speech, but he remained silent nonetheless. Well, at least Hongjoong had his attention.

“Wooyoung is my colleague and my friend. As charge nurse, I do not condone relationships between coworkers. Things can get messy and unprofessional real quick. But, as his _friend_ ,” Hongjoong’s voice dropped an octave, “you better believe that I will not hesitate to put you in one of these hospital beds. If Wooyoung says no, it means _no_. Capiche?”

For the second time that night, Hongjoong walked away without giving the man a chance to respond. He returned to the nursing station to see the other nurses gaggled around the residents, giggling away. Yunho and Seonghwa were leaning against the desk and _wrinkling his paperwork_ , but no matter.

 _Deep breaths, Hongjoong_.

He joined Wooyoung, who’s seated in the same place and staring blankly at an unfinished progress note. Hongjoong nudged him softly in the side.

“Hey, you okay?” he whispered as he leaned his head against the top of Wooyoung’s.

Wooyoung nods weakly, gravitating into Hongjoong’s warmth.

“You sure?” After a beat, Wooyoung shook his head.

Sighing through his nose, Hongjoong grabbed the closest chair and wheeled it toward Wooyoung, sitting down heavily.

“What did he say to you? Do you need me to beat him up? I already threatened him but I can totally destroy him right now, just say the word,” the words tumbled out of Hongjoong’s mouth rapidly as the man in question lazily paced back to the nursing station, barely glancing in their direction before joining the other two residents and their newly acquired fan base.

_Didn’t these nurses have a job to do?_

“He didn’t say anything bad,” Wooyoung whispered numbly, shaking Hongjoong from his train of thought.

“Then what did he say?”

At this point, Hongjoong was truly curious about what had put Wooyoung into a catatonic state. He’d _never_ seen him like this in the years they’d know each other. It was beyond worrisome, and all Hongjoong wanted to do was wrap him up and tell him everything was going to be okay.

“He… He called me beautiful. And he said he wants to take me out for dinner sometime,” Wooyoung whines and drops his head to the desk, the _thump_ of his skull making impact with the hard surface overpowered by Yunho animatedly telling a story to the enraptured nurses.

“And what did you say?” Hongjoong leaned closer, rubbing a soothing hand up and down Wooyoung’s tense back.

“Nothing!” Wooyoung abruptly sat straight up, eyes wild and locking with Hongjoong’s. “I. Said. Nothing. I didn’t know how to respond! This never happens to me, it’s always usually a quick hookup from a club or an app and I don’t know whattodohyungpleasehelp-“

“Okay, okay! Woo, slow the fuck down,” Hongjoong could barely keep up with Wooyoung’s hurried speech, the man starting to hyperventilate and turn red yet _again_. Clearly San’s words had affected him.

It is true. Wooyoung’s definitely not the type to go on dates. That was more Hongjoong’s style. Quick hookups and Grindr rendezvous were usually Wooyoung's preferred course of action. And while Hongjoong was glad that Wooyoung would possibly have the experience of being spoiled and treated right, he could not help but question San’s intentions. The man was too much of an arrogant ass and could only be up to no good.

He waited until Wooyoung looked at him without the crazy eyes before speaking again, still running his hand up and down Wooyoung’s back and occasionally scratching softly at the hair at the base of his skull.

“Do you want to go on a date with him?” Hongjoong asked gently.

“I-I don’t know. I think so?” Wooyoung whispered sullenly. “Should I?”

His eyes become wide and crystalline, and all Hongjoong wants to scream is _NO NO NO._

“I think you already answered your own question, Woo,” Hongjoong placed a soft kiss on Wooyoung’s temple. “Just remember that you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. I’m always here if you want to talk.”

“I know, hyung,” Wooyoung nuzzled his head into the space between Hongjoong’s neck and shoulder, breathing evening out.

The sweet moment is cut short all too quickly. The skin on the back of Hongjoong’s neck prickles when he cranes his head to see San looming over them. The man was smiling tight-lipped, dimples appearing on his cheeks with the strain.

“Nurse Kim, if you don’t mind, I would like to speak to Nurse Jung. Alone.”

Wooyoung and Hongjoong exchanged a quick glance, Hongjoong confirming that this is what Wooyoung wanted before climbing out of his chair and leaving the two alone.

He wandered over to the cluster of nurses fawning over the new residents, relieved to see Dr. Min standing in their midst.

The older doctor caught Hongjoong’s eye and waved him over.

“How did your introductory tour go?” he questioned Hongjoong.

“Not bad. Now that they are acquainted to the floor, I look forward to working with Dr. Jeong, Park and Choi in the future,” Hongjoong recited, almost robotic. Dr. Min didn’t seem to care, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

He clapped Yunho on the shoulder. It’s a comical sight because Yunho is at least half a foot taller and Dr. Min had to extend his arm way too high.

“Well, interns, how do you feel about your first shift? Think you’re ready to take on the rest of the 24-hour shifts coming your way?” Dr. Min asks.

The two give a monotonous “yessir” in unison. It is entirely possible that Dr. Min had lost all touch with reality and is in a caffeine generated dream state. The look in his eyes was odd, to say the least. All he did was exclaim “that’s the spirit!” before hobbling out of the unit.

Yunho chuckled after the man, standing to his full height before bowing to the nurses.

“I guess that’s our cue to leave,” he smiled widely. His grin is contagious and genuine, Hongjoong can tell. This one will be nice to work with.

“I look forward to working with you all during our internship.”

“As do I,” Seonghwa’s gaze is directed right at Hongjoong, and it’s all he can do not to look away.

“Me three,” San joined them, moving Hongjoong out of his way with a gentle hand on his shoulder.

_The nerve of this guy-_

They gave one last bow before turning on their heels and walking out of the unit to god knows where, but not before San could throw a wink over his shoulder in Wooyoung’s direction.

The moment the sliding doors shut, all hell breaks loose. The cacophony was enough to wake up a patient or two, and Hongjoong admittedly had a difficult time of it wrangling up the nurses.

Wooyoung remained sitting dazed in his chair, and uncharacteristically quiet to boot. The clock was a glaring red.

_6:14am._

_Time flies when you’re having an existential crisis._

The last hour of the shift happened in a blur. Last-minute paperwork was filled out, meds were administered, vitals were taken, shift change report was given, and Hongjoong and Wooyoung were out of there in a blink of an eye.

Which brings us back to the present, with Wooyoung still ‘processing’ and Hongjoong just trying to get the fuck home.

“What did you two end up talking about when he kicked me out of there?” Hongjoong asks.

He wasn’t bitter. Nope.

Not at all.

“Well… He asked me for my number,” Wooyoung says, pulling his phone out of his pocket and staring at the blackened screen. It remained black, no new notifications popping up.

“He’ll text eventually,” Hongjoong says, although he secretly hopes San just ghosts Wooyoung and leaves him alone. Or even better: the other way around.

 _Damn,_ he _really_ doesn’t like him.

“He’d better. He said he wants to take me on a date. Like, tomorrow night.”

Hongjoong’s eyebrows fly up so high he’s sure that they have become acquainted with his hairline. San is _unbelievable_.

“ _Tomorrow?_ ” Hongjoong squeaks. “Isn’t that a little, I dunno, fast? You guys just met tonight.”

Wooyoung groans and presses his palms over his eyes. “I know, hyung! But he’s just so _hot_ , and charming and he’s so fucking sexy-“

“Let me stop you right there,” Hongjoong cuts Wooyoung off before the man can continue complimenting who Hongjoong is sure is the bane of his entire fucking existence. “Do you just want to hook up with this guy?”

Wooyoung remains in his position for a solid 10 seconds before dropping his hands to his lap. It’s clear that he’s conflicted. The connotations of the word ‘date’ were something that Wooyoung never really had to consider before. He’s more of a ‘hit it and quit it’ type of guy, simple as that. He’s never really felt the need for that human connection.

But San- dear _god_.

In a matter of moments, San had Wooyoung imagining a life in the suburbs with 3 children and some sort of pet (probably a dog, but he’s still undecided).

Hongjoong sighs heavily. “Well, if you just want a hookup, then go for it. There’s no harm in it. At the very least, you’ll get free dinner and some sex.”

Wooyoung nods, turning his head slightly to glance at Hongjoong who was busying himself by starting the car and choosing a song to start his ride home.

“Yeah. Yeah, you’re right,” the idea of going on a date with San seemed better and better by the second.

“I’m always right,” Hongjoong looks at him pointedly, amusement glinting in his tired eyes. “Now get out of my car, I wanna get home and sleep.” Hongjoong teases while pressing the unlock button, the locks clicking open in all four doors.

“Right. Yes. Sleep.” Sleep sounds good, but Wooyoung is positively giddy. He knows there’s no way he’ll sleep until San messages him. He clambers out of Hongjoong’s car with all the grace of a baby elephant, reminding Hongjoong to text him when he reaches home.

The older man always forgot, but it did no harm to remind him.

He walks further into the parking garage and locates his car, a Dodge Charger that’s in significantly better shape than Hongjoong’s Civic.

Wooyoung throws his bag unceremoniously into the passenger seat, starting the engine and cranking the air conditioning. It’s the beginning of autumn, so the weather is mild, but Wooyoung had been drenched in sweat the moment Choi San leaned over him and whispered that he thought Wooyoung was beautiful.

It takes more than a few deep breathing exercises to get his heart rate back to normal. Wooyoung shifts his car into gear and pulls out of the parking garage.

His phone, resting in the cupholder beside him, lights up.

[Dr. Choi San]

Hey baby ;)

ooooo

“Remind me again _why_ you thought that you were welcome into my home?” Seonghwa asks bemusedly, the question mainly directed toward San, who is currently sprawled across his couch.

The man had offered Seonghwa and Yunho a ride home after their shift, but ended up inviting himself into Seonghwa’s house and monopolizing the couch. San is comfortably tucked under a blanket, one pillow strewn across the floor while the other is squished rather brutally into a shape that San deemed comfortable for his head.

“Because Yunho never invites us to his place, my place is a pigsty and yours is the closest to work. Plus you have those scented soaps that I really like, and a Netflix account. Frankly, it’s just rude that you don’t share the password with us,” San scoffs, running a hand through his now messy black hair.

“He does have a point,” Yunho says around a stuffed mouth, having helped himself to Seonghwa’s pantry. Seonghwa can only roll his eyes as Yunho crams a handful of potato chips in his mouth without even bothering to chew the previous mouthful.

“If I give you my Netflix password, will you _leave_?”

Seonghwa didn’t mean any ill intent of course, but after such a long shift, having an undisturbed nap sounded wonderful.

On any other occasion, he loves having his friends around. The three of them met during their first year of med school and have been joined at the hip ever since. It wasn’t that difficult, seeing how they all wanted to specialize in the same area, and they were all stellar students. Med school was a lot of study-sessions-turned-movie-marathons and last-minute cramming, with post-exam parties where he usually ended up dragging his friends’ drunk asses back to his place and making them hangover soup.

He wouldn’t trade Yunho and San for anything in the world. Usually.

Right now, he would trade them for 8 hours of sleep.

“Hmmm,” San pretended to think. “Nope.”

Seonghwa didn’t bother to mask the growl that spilled from his lips. How is San not completely burnt out right now? They were all awake for the better part of 24 hours, taking infrequent 30-minute naps in the ron-call room. Seonghwa didn’t know how he would do this for the rest of his internship, especially if San decides to come and impinge on his personal space repeatedly after a tiresome day.

A resonant _ding_ chimes from San’s phone, which is haphazardly hanging from the edge of Seonghwa’s coffee table. The owner of said phone all but scrambles to reach it, his upper body hanging off the couch as he crawls rather pathetically to grab for the lit-up screen.

 _Oh, right. The nurse_.

Just as the thought crosses Seonghwa’s mind, San huffs a chuckle of satisfaction.

“He replied,” San settles back into the couch, holding his phone above his head.

Seonghwa hopes it falls on his face.

“What did he say?” Yunho rounds the couch, holding a pint of ice cream and three spoons in his ridiculously large hands. He sets himself down on top of San’s outstretched legs, the man currently being crushed too distracted to fight back against the glutton.

“He just said ‘hey’ with a smiley face emoji,” San extends the phone to Yunho, who looks at the message before handing the phone over his shoulder to Seonghwa.

“He totally wants me,” San declares, crossing his hands behind his head like the conceited dick that he is.

“You got that from ‘hey’ and a smiley face?” Seonghwa scoffs as he hands the phone back to San. He loves San. He really does. But his friend is admittedly a bit of a fuckboy.

Scratch that.

He is totally a fuckboy.

Seonghwa and Yunho had their fair share of flings during their college and med school days, but San… San was on another level. He managed to gain a bit of a reputation while he was at school, and he was notorious for his constant one-night stands and spontaneous hook-ups. Seonghwa would be lying if he said it isn’t even slightly concerning. He’s the one who takes San to all of his STD tests, after all. If he doesn’t drag San to the doctor by the cuff of his ear, Seonghwa is 110% sure San would be declared a walking, talking public health hazard.

“Obviously I didn’t get all that from ‘hey’ hyung,” San rolls his eyes. “Did you see the way he reacted when I was flirting with him?”

“You mean when you were violating his personal space?” Yunho interjects before Seonghwa can, opening the tub of vanilla ice cream and drizzling chocolate syrup on top.

_When and where did he find chocolate syrup? Did Seonghwa even own chocolate syrup?_

He offers a spoon to San and Seonghwa. San sits up, resting his chin on his bent knees while Seonghwa leans over the back of the couch.

“It isn’t a violation if he liked it,” San brushes off nonchalantly, stuffing his face with a spoonful of ice cream before promptly squirting the chocolate syrup directly into his open mouth.

Seonghwa grimaces. “How do you know he liked it? He looked pretty uncomfortable to me.”

“Well, he did agree to go out with me, so there’s that,” San looks pointedly at Seonghwa. “But then there’s the issue of the other nurse. Nurse Kim…” San trails off, eyes unfocused and staring unseeingly at the fabric of Seonghwa’s couch.

“He’s gonna be an issue,” San sighs, scooping up another bite of the ice cream. “He even threatened me, and I’m not going to lie, he did scare me a little.”

Yunho snorts, melted ice cream dripping from the corner of his lips before he wheezes, “He’s even shorter than you, and he managed to intimidate you?”

Seonghwa grabs a tissue from his kitchen countertop and dabs at the mess Yunho’s made on his face as the man continues to giggle at San.

“Hey man, that guy’s got a stick up his ass for no reason. I get that he’s protective of his friend, but also let me have some fun, y’know?” San complains. Seonghwa is certain that his eyeballs are going to fall out of his head from how much he’s rolling them today.

“I didn’t think he was that bad, he’s just being a good friend,” Seonghwa admits, thinking back to the blue-haired nurse. Nurse Kim- _Hongjoong_ \- was kind to them, and extremely intelligent from what Seonghwa could discern in the short time they had interacted. He’s also extremely attractive.

But that’s beside the point.

“He’s just going to get in the way, I can feel it,” San seethes. Seonghwa quirks an eyebrow at his rather passionate reaction, but remains quiet. It will take too much energy to hold this conversation with San, and it’s just not worth it at the moment.

Yunho continues to munch away at the ice cream, bottomless pit that he is. Between him and San, the two of them have already cleared out half the tub. Seonghwa gingerly dips his spoon into the melting mass of vanilla, savoring the sweet flavor. He hasn’t eaten much since the start of his shift, and actual food would probably be the better option, but the sugary treat is just _too good_.

He’s entirely focused on the ice cream and not really listening to San, who’s droning on about Wooyoung. It’s only when San gasps suddenly and causes Seonghwa’s spoonful of ice cream to drip onto his couch that he snaps his attention back to the younger man.

“Hey hyung, remember that favour you owe me?” San has a shit-eating grin on his face that makes Seonghwa freeze in his tracks. He is well aware of the favour that San is referring to, but he would be lying if he said he wasn’t afraid of the words that were about to leave San’s lips.

It happened back in med school, when Seonghwa was hooking up with some guy he’d met on Tinder. The guy was cute and all, but he was getting rather… _clingy_. And while Seonghwa had had relationships in the past, this guy was not going to be one of them.

Seonghwa told him this one day after a round of sex when the guy had insisted he stay and cuddle with Seonghwa, and make him dinner. It was a sweet offer, but it wasn’t really what Seonghwa was looking for, so he told him just that.

The Tinder hook-up had then launched into a rampage, throwing pieces of furniture around and in Seonghwa’s general direction. When he’d run out of breakable items to destroy, he’d turned his attention on Seonghwa. Luckily, the guy didn’t do much damage save for a bruise on Seonghwa’s arm where he’d grabbed him too hard before San showed up on his doorstep for their weekly movie night.

San, being a third-degree black belt, kicked the man to the curb in a matter of moments and silently helped Seonghwa clean up the mess. They stayed quiet for most of the night, San too afraid to say anything that might worsen how Seonghwa was feeling.

While Seonghwa was physically fine, it was just shocking that his date had reacted so strongly, especially after making such a sweet offer. He never expected things to escalate so intensely, and he was glad San showed up when he did. 

He’d whispered this to San as they lay in a blanket burrito of San’s making on the couch, San spooning him from behind and hugging him tightly to his chest. He hugged and hugged until Seonghwa pried himself out of his friend’s arms hours later, reassuring him that he was alright and insisting that they finally start their movie night. 

Upon hearing that Seonghwa was, in fact, okay, he’d reverted back to his usual behaviour and declared that Seonghwa owed him an undeniable favour one day in exchange for his services (which he listed as emotional support and housekeeping). To his credit, he didn’t mention the abuse that Seonghwa had faced nor the fact that he had to forcibly remove a man from Seonghwa’s property, which was _something_ , Seonghwa supposed.

Hearing San bring up the favour after years makes Seonghwa feel like he’s been doused by a bucket of ice water. Whatever the man is about to ask of him is not going to be good, or moral at the very least. And Seonghwa knows that no matter the ask, he must do it. He owes San that much.

“Yes, I remember the favour,” Seonghwa admits, meeting San’s mischievous gaze.

“Well, I’m calling it in now,” San leans closer to Seonghwa, his vanilla-scented breath brushing Seonghwa’s now-pale face.

_What is with this man and personal space?_

“I need you to get Nurse Kim out of the picture. I don’t care how. Distract him, date him, dick him down, whatever. Just divert his attention from Wooyoung and I enough for me to fuck him in peace,” San orders, knowing that Seonghwa has no choice but to agree. Yunho merely observes the exchange, well aware of the circumstances of the favour. The ice cream tub has been completely emptied out at this point, the remnants even having been scraped out by Yunho’s spoon. Seonghwa wouldn’t be surprised if the man licked the tub clean.

“Ugh, do I have to?” Seonghwa moans, burying his face into his hands. Hongjoong is hot and all, but he isn’t exactly Seonghwa’s type. He has no idea how he’s going to go about this.

And although it is completely wrong and a dick move, he can’t help but be a little excited at the prospect of a hook-up. It has been a while, after all.

San nods enthusiastically. “Yes, yes you do. You _owe_ me.” He is way too excited about this, and Seonghwa groans in defeat.

“If I agree, will you _leave_?” Seonghwa has officially maxed out on his daily dose of San.

“Yep,” San pops the ‘p’, grinning so widely that his dimples pit his cheeks.

“Fine,” Seonghwa sighs, rubbing a hand over his tired face. How badly could this go? Best case scenario, he gets a sort of ‘friend with benefits’, although the other party won’t be privy to it. Worst case scenario, Hongjoong rejects him and San has to come up with a new game plan. For Seonghwa, it’s a soft win-win.

San throws his arms around Seonghwa’s neck and plants a wet kiss on his cheek before bouncing off the couch and heading to the door. The man doesn’t even have the decency to fold the blanket and fix the pillows. At least Yunho throws out the ice cream tub, even if he does leave the dirty spoons for Seonghwa to wash.

His friends yell their goodbyes as they walk out the front door, which Seonghwa promptly locks behind them lest they try to come back in for round two of ‘Let’s See Who Can Exhaust Seonghwa The Most’.

In 30 minutes, Seonghwa’s washed and ready for bed, the events of the past day finally catching up with him. His bed is soft and inviting, and he buries himself under the covers, welcoming the warmth. It’s not long before he drifts off, the image of a certain blue-haired nurse claiming his dreams.

ooooo

The next time Seonghwa sees Hongjoong is two days later, halfway into his own shift. Hongjoong is just beginning his night shift, walking around with a vital signs cart from room to room to check on his patients.

Dr. Min is on-call that night, but he decided it would be a good idea to hang out on the unit to get a feel for the flow. The waiting room is considerably more active, with about three people waiting to be seen.

Hongjoong isn’t charge nurse tonight, so he’s helping triage the patients in empty rooms, doing head-to-toe assessments before calling Dr. Min in for diagnoses and further testing.

San is, of course, talking to Wooyoung, but the other man looks more comfortable with San invading his personal bubble. Seonghwa supposes their date the other night went well, although he’s yet to hear anything about it from San.

“Dr. Min,” he hears Hongjoong’s melodic voice carry over from the second triage room. Seonghwa’s heart pounds, not because Hongjoong makes him nervous, but because of what he knows he has to do. He still owes San this _stupid_ favour, and he’s yet to make good on it. Tonight is his chance to make a move, and it’s been a while. Seonghwa fears he’s gotten rusty.

“Dr. Jeong, Dr. Park, Dr. Choi,” Dr. Min claps his hands together and gestures to where Hongjoong awaits them. “Shall we?”

The residents trail the doctor into the small triage room. An older woman is sat atop the examination table with who appears to be her husband standing next to her and holding her hand. Hongjoong settles himself down at the small desk with a monitor crammed in the corner, pulling out a keyboard and signing into the online documentation system. San is the last to step into the room, sliding the door shut behind him.

The room is a tight fit for all of them, but they make it work. Seonghwa can feel the sweat beading at his hairline from the sudden increase in temperature in tight quarters.

“Alright Nurse Kim, give us your report,” Dr. Min says happily, gesturing to Hongjoong.

“Okay, this is Mrs. Jeon and her husband. She is a 55-year-old female who experienced an episode of chest pain earlier today while exercising, rated a 6 on a scale of 1 to 10; right now she is experiencing no chest pain. Vital signs are stable, although blood pressure is slightly elevated. She told me that she has a history of hypertension and is currently taking valsartan to treat it. She is taking no other medications. No shortness of breath or respiratory distress noted and her O2 sats are 96% on room air. Lung sounds are clear and equal bilaterally, heart rate is regular, S1 and S2 audible. Bowel sounds are present, abdomen is soft and non-tender. Although this is her first time experiencing an episode like this, she did report to me that her family has a history of heart disease,” Hongjoong finishes his brief report, turning his attention to the patient and smiling gently.

“Thank you for your report, Nurse Kim,” Dr. Min beams at Hongjoong before turning to his residents. “So, what is our first course of action?”

The residents begin to rattle off names of different blood tests, as well as completing further interviewing and assessment of the patient. Dr. Min nods approvingly before turning to Hongjoong.

“May I have the chart, Nurse Kim?” he holds out his hand to Hongjoong, who hands him the binder and opens up the ‘Orders’ tab online, already knowing what Dr. Min is going to say.

The doctor scribbles away in the doctor’s orders page, giving Hongjoong instructions at the same time. “Let’s get a CBC, trops, CK-MB and a 12-lead ECG done. We can also send an order to pharmacy for some sublingual nitro, because I have a feeling, Mrs. Jeon, that this is a case of angina.” Dr. Min speaks warmly to the couple who have been sitting silently in the midst of the commotion. “We just want to rule out a heart attack before making any final decisions. After we complete the ECG and get all the lab results back, we can figure out the next course of action.”

Mrs. Jeon nods in understanding, thanking the doctor as he closes the chart and hands it back to Hongjoong. He shakes hands with both the clients and bids them farewell before exiting the room with the interns, leaving Hongjoong to speak softly with the couple about the next steps and registration.

“That was rather anticlimactic,” Yunho grumbles as they reach the nursing station.

“It is often like this, Dr. Jeong. Common cases that we get all the time include chest pain, upset stomachs, broken bones, skin infections, et cetera. You get to learn the signs after spending some time here,” Dr. Min sits down and leans back in his chair. “In fact, a lot of a healthcare provider’s job is just ancillary stuff like paperwork, which I’m sure you all already know.”

Whirling around, Dr. Min logs into the online documentation system and shows them the patient profiles, as well as the orders that Hongjoong has put in and the consultation notes. It’s rather mundane, but Seonghwa doesn’t mind.

It’s not long after that Hongjoong strolls back to the nursing station, eyes scanning over a patient chart and a soft smile pulling the corners of his lips upward. Seonghwa can’t deny that the man is gorgeous. He’s definitely attracted to him in some capacity, even if it is purely physical.

He peeks at Hongjoong out of the corner of his eye, watching as the man settles in to complete some paperwork, much like Seonghwa should be doing now too. He knows, though, if he doesn’t make his move now, San’s never going to let him hear the end of it.

 _Speak of the devil_.

San sidles up to Seonghwa, nudging him none too gently with his elbow and raising his eyebrows suggestively in Hongjoong’s direction. Dr. Min is too distracted by whatever it is he’s doing on the screen at the moment to pay attention to the painfully obvious mental conversation that San and Seonghwa are having.

“Come on man, you owe me,” San whispers aggressively. “I haven’t even gotten to second base with Wooyoung yet, so I really need you to do this for me.”

Leave it to San to think exclusively with his dick.

“Fine,” Seonghwa hisses back. The cheeky grin San shoots in his direction makes his blood boil and cheeks heat up from pure annoyance, but there’s no plausible way out of this now.

Hongjoong is sitting alone in a corner of the nursing station when Seonghwa drags a chair over and settles down next to him. The nurse glances at him briefly, going back to his paperwork for a moment before registering that it’s Seonghwa sitting beside him and immediately straightening up, eyes widening comically.

“Oh, Dr. Park! I didn’t realize it was you at first, I’m sorry,” the man bows his head and Seonghwa chuckles.

_Cute._

“Don’t worry about it,” he waves off the apology. “And please, call me Seonghwa.”

Hongjoong’s face flushes the loveliest shade of pink at Seonghwa’s words. Perhaps this won’t be so difficult after all.

“I don’t know if that’s approp-“ Hongjoong is cut off before he can finish, Seonghwa’s hand coming to rest gently on his forearm.

“I insist. We’re going to be working very closely for the next year, and we’re probably the same age anyway,” Seonghwa rationalizes, smiling and biting his bottom lip in a way that he knows will send anyone into a frenzy (or at least it did in college).

Hongjoong’s Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, trying very hard not to stare at Seonghwa’s lips but failing miserably.

 _Bingo_.

“If that’s the case, then you can call me Hongjoong,” his voice cracks as he says it, and he visibly cringes. Seonghwa pretends not to notice, admittedly a little giddy at how easily he’s affecting Hongjoong.

“Actually Hongjoong, I came over here to ask you something,” Seonghwa leans closer, knee now knocking gently with Hongjoong’s. The nurse doesn’t move away, so Seonghwa takes it as a sign to proceed.

“I was wondering if you’d like to go out for dinner sometime?” Seonghwa lowers his tone as he says it, volume dropping to almost a whisper. He can feel goosebumps rise where his hand is still resting on Hongjoong’s forearm.

Hongjoong sputters in surprise, pretty pink lips opening and closing but rendering no sound save for some unintelligible stuttering.

“Oh, um- I don’t… I don’t know what to say,” Hongjoong is now beet red, chest rising and falling like he’s run a marathon. He lightly pulls his arm from under Seonghwa’s hand and lets it fall limply into his lap.

“Well, you have two options,” Seonghwa teasingly quirks an eyebrow. “Yes,” he presses his thigh against Hongjoong’s, the nurse gulping at the action. “Or no… Although I’m really hoping you’ll say yes.” Seonghwa winks at Hongjoong and he can practically see the man lose all sense of sanity. It is undeniably satisfying to Seonghwa. He knows that what he’s doing isn’t right, but _damn_ if doesn’t feel good to get back on the playing field.

Hongjoong is silent for a beat before he answers so softly Seonghwa almost doesn’t hear it.

“Okay, sure. I’d like that.”

“It’s a date then,” Seonghwa pulls his phone from his pocket swiftly, handing it to Hongjoong to enter his cell number. Seonghwa pretends like he doesn’t notice Hongjoong’s hands quivering subtly.

Their fingers brush as Hongjoong returns the device, the nurse drawing his hand back instantly like he’d grazed an open flame. Seonghwa smirks inwardly but keeps the easy smile on his face as he rises.

“I’ll text you,” he winks at Hongjoong again just for fun before turning on his heel and strutting away, leaving Hongjoong to gawk at his retreating back.

 _Maybe this will be fun_.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, thank you for reading!  
> I would love it if you left a kudos and comment, it really means so much to me!  
> Also come follow me on twt @useumssi if you feel like it!  
> Until next time 👋🏽


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not beta read, sorry y'all  
> For reference, the outfits I used for this chapter were the ones they wore on ep 429 of Weekly Idol!  
> ALSO! If you didn't catch the note in the previous chapter and you have read this before, I made a smol change to the characters and edited these 2 chapters! The main difference is that San, Yunho and Seonghwa are interns now, not residents.

To Hongjoong’s surprise, Seonghwa texts him the next day. It catches him off guard, if he’s being completely honest. The whole situation is a little unbelievable, even if Hongjoong has the texts to prove that he is, in fact, living in this reality.

Their conversation was short and flowed easily enough, and Hongjoong now has a date with a hot doctor this Saturday. Seonghwa originally propositioned him with dinner, but they decided on lunch and a stroll through their local park. With the summer season coming to a close, Hongjoong was more than happy to take up Seonghwa’s offer for an outdoor activity, desperate to hold onto the remnants of the warmer weather.

With only one day until their date, Hongjoong is definitely _not_ losing it as he calls Wooyoung and _doesn’t_ beg him to help him decide what to wear.

“I don’t know if I should dress up, or keep it more casual,” Hongjoong holds up two shirts- a simple tee and a button-down. Wooyoung’s voice chimes in over the speaker on his phone.

“Did he tell you where you’re going?” the man’s voice is slightly muffled from god knows what, but Hongjoong isn’t about to question it, too focused on his own conundrum.

“Nope, I’ve got no clue. He said he’d take care of it.” Hongjoong throws the button-down over his shoulder. He examines the tee for a beat before allowing it to fall on the floor, diving into his closet once more.

“That’s kinda hot, not gonna lie,” Wooyoung says. “Better to keep it safe and go fancy-casual. Not too much, but also make it look like you put in the tiniest bit of effort.”

Hongjoong nods to himself, yanking a white sweater from the depths of his wardrobe. It’s got a design in the center, but nothing too outlandish, and zipper that extends from the collar to the base of his sternum. A pair of dark blue jeans follow, with patterned patches and small tears in either leg.

Hongjoong lays it flat on his bed and snaps a picture, sending it to Wooyoung for judgment. He can hear the distinct ding of Wooyoung’s phone over the line as the photo arrives, as well as Wooyoung’ hum of approval.

“Those boots you just bought would look great with this. And maybe add a jacket?” Hongjoong rushes back to his closet, pulling a tan jacket with a black collar off its hangar. The outfit is reorganized on the bed, the jacket engulfing the white sweater.

He sends the new outfit to Wooyoung, who squeals in delight.

“Yes hyung, you’re gonna look so hot!”

Hongjoong can’t help the smile that splits his face. Just thinking about Saturday is making him dizzy with excitement. With the luck Hongjoong’s had in his love life, he’s looking forward to a fresh start. And with an insanely gorgeous doctor, no less.

He hangs the outfit on the hooks on the back of his bedroom door. Turning back to his room, he can’t stop the deep sigh that escapes him as he scans the absolute mess he’s made. It looks like half his closet is on the floor, while the other half rests mockingly in a pile on his double bed. He has half a mind to just leave it as it is and plunge into the mountain of cashmere and denim, desperate for some reprieve.

“You never told me how your date with Dr. Choi went,” Hongjoong says as he grudgingly bends to pick up the discarded clothing and throws them onto his bed.

“His name is San, first of all,” he can practically feel Wooyoung rolling his eyes at him. “And the date went great. We went to this fancy restaurant- he paid- and we talked the whole time about absolutely everything. Then he drove me back home and kissed me goodnight.”

Hongjoong scoffs in disbelief. “Forgive me if I don’t believe you, Woo. You’re telling me that this guy didn’t even try to get into your pants?”

“No! He was super respectful; everything was above the waist. I’m not going to lie, it felt really nice to be treated like a person and not a quick fuck for once.” Wooyoung sighs dreamily into the receiver and it’s now Hongjoong’s turn to roll his eyes.

“Whatever, I still think he’s up to something. That guy just rubs me the wrong way, and I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“I know, I know,” he can hear the smile in Wooyoung’s voice. “But trust me hyung, I think this guy is different. We’re going out again this weekend.”

Hongjoong’s heart drops to his stomach. As much as he wants to yell and scream at Wooyoung to drop San and run in the opposite direction, he knows he can’t mainly because he knows Wooyoung is stubborn and won’t listen anyway. But that won’t stop him from giving unsolicited advice.

“Just… be careful Woo. I can just tell he’s a player- I’ve definitely met his type before- and I don’t want you to get hurt in the end,” Hongjoong says softly, oozing all the sincerity he possibly can into his words.

“Yeah, yeah, hyung I know,” Wooyoung says. He’s touched that Hongjoong cares so much, and he knows his hyung only wants to protect him, but he really does have a good feeling about San. Wooyoung’s heart warms at just the thought of the man and how gentle he was the night of their date. And how his eyes crinkled into crescents whenever he smiled. And how his dimples made his face even more attractive. And how his hands held Wooyoung-

“Woo! Are you even listening?” Hongjoong snaps Wooyoung out of his thoughts. Damn, he’s in really deep already.

“Of course I am hyung.”

“Mhm, okay,” Hongjoong teases. He can’t be upset at Wooyoung for being so smitten with San. Hell, he’s the same with Seonghwa. And with every single boyfriend he’s ever had. However, Hongjoong would be lying if he said he wasn’t scared for what San has in store for Wooyoung. He just has to figure out what game the doctor is playing first.

“Thanks for your help with the outfit, Woo. I’ll let you know how the date goes.”

God, even saying the word ‘date’ makes Hongjoong’s stomach twist up in anticipation. Hongjoong throws the last article of clothing from the floor onto his bed before hauling an armful of hangars from his closet.

“Alright, hyung. I’ll talk to you later,” Hongjoong’s phone beeps as the call is ended and he sighs again, eyeing the monstrosity atop his bed. With Wooyoung off the line, Hongjoong has nothing but his own thoughts to keep him company. And boy, are they racing.

Endless scenarios dance in Hongjoong’s head: their date being quiet and awkward, Seonghwa standing him up, Hongjoong saying and/or doing something embarrassing and never being able to show his face to Seonghwa again… the possibilities are endless.

Just deep, slow breaths.

“It’ll be fine,” Hongjoong says aloud to himself, picking up the hangars and beginning the arduous task of reorganizing the chaos of his wardrobe.

“It’ll be fine.”

ooooo

Saturday rolls around a lot faster than Hongjoong hopes, and he soon finds himself standing outside of a very expensive-looking barbeque place.

Thank god for the outfit he chose. He certainly doesn’t look out of place here, and given that the weather decided to get a bit chilly, the jacket Wooyoung suggested has been his saving grace.

The air is cool and crisp, but not uncomfortable, and Hongjoong takes in several deep breaths. It feels almost cleansing.

He and Seonghwa agreed to meet for 2 o’clock; Hongjoong’s phone reads 1:56PM as he checks it for the umpteenth time for any message from Seonghwa.

Nothing.

Surprise, surprise.

The doctor had offered to pick him from his home, but Hongjoong denied the offer multiple times regardless of Seonghwa’s insistence. He does have a car, but sometimes he finds himself craving the quiet pandemonium of public transit. In a strange way, it helps Hongjoong relax; people watching, he finds, is a great way to get out of your own head. And frankly, Hongjoong really needed to zen out for this date before he had a stroke.

The entire trip only took about 30 minutes, and Hongjoong still ended up arriving before Seonghwa. The digital clock finally strikes two and perfectly on cue, Seonghwa struts around the corner dressed like absolute sin.

He’s wearing these wickedly tight black skinny jeans with a plain white t-shirt and black leather jacket thrown over the ensemble. The pants are hugging his surprisingly thick thighs in ways that Hongjoong would have never imagined, and the tucked white shirt accentuates Seonghwa’s small waist. His hair is swept up off his forehead, and his full lips and chiseled cheeks are tinted pink. Hongjoong’s mouth begins to water, and it has nothing to do with the scent of grilling meat wafting from the restaurant.

Seonghwa’s gaze is directed at his phone, fingers typing away furiously. A ding sounds from Hongjoong’s phone, and without looking, he knows it’s from Seonghwa.

The man walking towards him lifts his head at the sound, gaze locking with Hongjoong’s. Almost immediately, a grin splits his face, the apples of Seonghwa’s cheeks rounding out and his beautifully white teeth blinding Hongjoong. The sight of him nearly sweeps Hongjoong off his feet; he’s completely caught off guard by the way his heart jackhammers in his chest and the way his entire body tingles, up to very tips of his fingers.

“Were you waiting long?” Seonghwa asks, stopping directly in front of Hongjoong. In such close proximity, Hongjoong has to crane his head back to look at Seonghwa’s face, and it is completely unfair how gorgeous he looks even from this angle.

“Not at all,” Hongjoong shakes his head and returns the smile still on Seonghwa’s face. “I just got here like five minutes ago.”

“Shall we head in, then?” Hongjoong nods, suddenly acutely aware of how hungry he actually is. Seonghwa leads him in with a hand hovering just over the small of his back, and it feels absolutely electric. Shocks of lightning race up Hongjoong’s spine at the briefest contact as they walk up the stairs and enter the restaurant.

Seonghwa’s apparently made a reservation, because they’re promptly seated in the crowded establishment, Seonghwa even going so far as to pull out Hongjoong’s chair for him. His first reaction at the act is to (embarrassingly) just stare at the chair until Seonghwa takes him by his shoulders and presses him gently into the seat, chuckling silently.

The atmosphere is a little awkward, but what else is to be expected on a first date? They pick up their menus, Hongjoong’s eyes bugging out at the prices. He knows that quality barbecue is expensive, but this is just _ridiculous_. Their bill is definitely going to be more than he can afford, and Hongjoong deflates at the thought. Nurses make pretty good money, but he still has bills to pay!

“Why don’t we just get this combo?” Seonghwa leans forward, showing his menu to Hongjoong and pointing at an exuberantly priced meal. “It has a little bit of everything, and I want you to try it all. The meat here is really great.” Seonghwa is too busy still scanning the options to see all the blood rush from Hongjoong’s face upon seeing the price.

“Um, Seonghwa, isn’t that a bit, y’know, expensive…?'' The last word leaves Hongjoong’s mouth as a quiet, unconfident whisper, and it’s only then that Seonghwa stops ruminating about meat and registers Hongjoong’s sickly complexion.

“Oh my goodness, are you okay?” Seonghwa drops the menu and presses the back of his hand to Hongjoong’s clammy forehead. That sparks the most outrageous internal battle that Hongjoong has ever had to deal with to date- to draw back, or to lean in to Seonghwa’s unbelievably soft hands?

“Y- yeah, I’m fine. It’s just that I wasn’t exactly prepared to be spending so much today, and honestly, I don’t even know how much money is in my bank account right now, and if my card declines it’s gonna be really, really awkward and-“ Hongjoong’s embarrassment turns into panicky rambling in no time, and Seonghwa cuts him off abruptly, barking with laughter.

It renders Hongjoong speechless, his very bones vibrating with the melodic sound. His shock is swiftly overcome by mortification, face flushing beet red.

“Why are you laughing at me?” his voice comes out small and pathetic, Seonghwa covering his mouth to contain his amusement straightaway at Hongjoong’s question.

“It’s nothing!” Seonghwa chokes out between giggles.

_He’s so cute._

“I seriously thought you were about to vomit all over the table, and come to see you were worried about the price,” Seonghwa falls into a fit of laughter again. Hongjoong huffs, crossing his arms in front of his chest indignantly.

“It’s a valid concern! I’m broke as hell at the moment-“ once again he’s cut off, this time with a wave of Seonghwa’s hand.

“Hongjoong, I’m not expecting you to pay, I swear it,” Seonghwa’s eyes shine with unshed tears, his face now also flushed bright red.

“It’s not fair for you to pay the whole thing when I’m eating half of it!” Hongjoong rebuttals.

“Please, Hongjoong, don’t worry about it. I asked you out, and I chose the place without telling you. I’m sure as hell not letting you pay; this is a date after all,” Seonghwa moves his hand away from his mouth, laughter having died down but that breathtaking smile still adorning his face.

Hongjoong opens his mouth to argue again, but Seonghwa beats him to it.

“If it really bothers you so much, you can pay for the next one,” the man says with a sly smirk, mirth dancing in his eyes.

Once again Hongjoong is left red-faced, speechless, and completely at the mercy of a man he barely knows.

The server saves Hongjoong from having to reply. Their order is taken quickly, Seonghwa requesting the combo while Hongjoong continues to protest weakly from across the table.

The two fall into easy conversation soon after, their banter flowing endlessly and effortlessly. Despite their limited interaction before the date, Hongjoong finds himself incredibly comfortable with Seonghwa.

They talk about everything from their childhoods to cringey college stories until their food arrives. Seonghwa removes his leather jacket as he takes charge of the grill, his toned arms flexing as he cuts through the meat easily and cooks it with all the flair of a seasoned (ha, pun intended) professional.

Hongjoong’s glad he didn’t convince Seonghwa to get something else because this meat is inarguably the best goddamn thing he’s ever tasted in his life. It’s marinated with the perfect blend of spices and melts like butter in his mouth.

The topic of conversation has moved on to medical mishaps, Hongjoong talking excitedly through a mouth full of meat and lettuce. Seonghwa listens intently, his mouth equally stuffed and eyes crinkled in amusement.

“… and so I unwrapped his foot, and I swear to god his fucking toe fell off.” Hongjoong makes another wrap as he speaks, placing pieces of meat and side dishes into the piece of lettuce resting on his palm.

When he looks up, he sees Seonghwa’s mouth gaping in amazement and disbelief at Hongjoong’s story. It’s just such a good opportunity, and in a flash, Hongjoong’s leaning across the table and cramming the bossam between Seonghwa’s lips.

Seonghwa’s eyes widen comically and he makes a noise of protest as Hongjoong fits the overloaded wrap into his mouth, but the two of them fall into a fit of giggles instantly.

Somehow, Seonghwa manages to pack the bossam into his cheeks, and it reminds Hongjoong of a hamster. He makes sure to tell Seonghwa this, and the doctor isn’t sure whether to be offended or amused by the comparison.

Their meal ends off with Seonghwa paying for the food at the counter, pulling what looks like a freaking gold card out of his wallet. Hongjoong meets him at the door, Seonghwa grabbing his hand before even exiting the restaurant. At least with the cool air outside, Hongjoong can blame his flaming blush on the weather.

This date is quite frankly going better than Hongjoong could have ever hoped for. Seonghwa is kind and attentive, and super into skinship it seems. He doesn’t let go of Hongjoong’s hand until they get to his car, which is parked behind the restaurant. Even then, he unlocks the vehicle (a freaking BMW) and holds the door open as Hongjoong slips in. The chivalry is unprecedented and Hongjoong is practically buzzing at the display. He knows it’s probably the bare minimum that Seonghwa’s doing, but he has to admit it feels really nice to be treated so well after a long and sordid relationship history.

“You ready?” Seonghwa asks as he buckles himself in, the engine roaring to life. He reaches above their heads to a little compartment near the lights and pulls out a pair of sunglasses. Seonghwa slips them onto his nose and _fuck_ he looks good. Hongjoong can only nod, his breath caught in his throat at Seonghwa’s sheer beauty. How in the world did he get this lucky?

Music plays softly in the background as the two pick up their conversation right where they left off, and the 20-minute ride seems to pass in the blink of an eye. About halfway into the drive, Seonghwa moves his right hand from the wheel and rests it gently on Hongjoong’s thigh, palm facing upward. The sudden placement of his hand close to Hongjoong’s crotch startles him slightly, but he shyly places his hand into Seonghwa’s waiting palm anyway. The man driving continues to talk and ask Hongjoong questions as if he didn’t just give the nurse a freaking emotional boner.

Hongjoong is admittedly slightly disappointed when Seonghwa turns the engine off and steps out of the car, but the moment Hongjoong gets out, their hands are locked together again. Hongjoong’s heart swells to the size of an ocean, looking down at their intertwined hands and then up at Seonghwa’s face. The taller man is completely oblivious to the effect he’s having on Hongjoong.

“Let’s walk down by the river,” Seonghwa points and tugs on Hongjoong’s hand lightly. At this rate, Hongjoong would follow Seonghwa off a fucking cliff if it meant he could hold his hand for just a second longer.

They stroll along the riverbank hand in hand, not speaking and just enjoying the view, the weather and each other. It’s nice, and it gives Hongjoong a chance to buffer and register all the information that he’s gathered about Seonghwa in the few short hours they’ve been together.

He’s learned that Seonghwa has an older brother, that he met Yunho and San in med school, that he wanted to be a dancer when he was in high school, and that becoming a doctor was a last-minute decision when he was applying for college. He also found that he could make Seonghwa laugh quite easily, and he loves hearing the sound of it, so it’s a win-win situation all around. Seonghwa himself tells stories quite animatedly, eyes become wide and hands flailing about when he gets too excited. It’s so endearing, and Hongjoong can feel a smile tugging the corners of his lips upward as they walk.

“So, why did you choose to become a nurse?” Seonghwa breaks their comfortable silence first. The question surprises Hongjoong, the topic never having come up in their previous conversation.

Hongjoong chuckles as he answers. “It’s not some big, life-changing story like some people have, unfortunately. It’s actually rather boring,” Hongjoong turns his head to see Seonghwa staring expectantly at him. He squeals internally at Seonghwa’s rapt expression and continues.

“When I was in high school, I had a family member who was sick. It was a pretty hard time for all of us, but it was the nurses that really made a difference when we were starting to lose hope. They made our experience almost joyful, and I thought at that point that someday I want to bring light to someone when they’re going through a really dark time.”

Hongjoong regrets it immediately after he finishes speaking. God, he’s sure he sounded stupid as hell. His face is burning and his gaze is locked on his boots as they continue to walk. Seonghwa doesn’t saying anything at first, and Hongjoong’s first course of action is to begin his panicked rambling once again in an attempt to save himself from his embarrassing admission.

“I know it’s really stupid, and it was a super long time ago. Plus I was just a kid and I didn’t really know what-“ Seonghwa cuts him off by whirling Hongjoong around to face him. His eyes are shining, crystalline as they pierce deep into Hongjoong’s soul and dig their diamond-edged claws in there.

“I don’t think it’s stupid. At all,” Seonghwa’s hand drops from Hongjoong’s, and both of the doctor’s warm palms come up to cup his flushed cheeks. Hongjoong freezes, unsure of what to make of the sudden display of affection.

“I think it’s beautiful. And I think your story isn’t that far off from mine. Maybe one day I’ll tell it to you,” Seonghwa whispers the last part, his thumb swiping gently over Hongjoong’s cheekbone. They stand there, still as statues, just staring into each other’s eyes. Hongjoong can see Seonghwa’s gaze rove over his face before finally dropping to his lips.

“Hongjoong…” Seonghwa’s voice is soft and deep. Hongjoong only hums in response, his gut twisting at the words that he knows Seonghwa is about to say.

“Can I kiss you?”

Hongjoong can’t nod fast enough, and before he knows it, Seonghwa’s lips are pressed against his.

Lightning strikes as he presses himself close to Seonghwa warmth. The sensation begins at his lips and the aftershocks make their way down to his toes. Seonghwa’s lips are soft as they push gently against his, waiting for Hongjoong to move and pressing insistently when Hongjoong finally kisses him back.

It has to be the most PG kiss Hongjoong has ever had in his life, and yet he feels like the wind’s been knocked out of him as he pulls away just enough to look up at Seonghwa. The taller man smiles down at him, his full lips even fuller from their short-lived kiss, and it’s all Hongjoong can do not to yank him down and crash their lips back together.

Seonghwa leans forward and presses a last, tender peck to Hongjoong’s mouth, removing his palms from the nurse’s face to grasp Hongjoong’s hands, which had become tangled in Seonghwa’s shirt god-knows-when.

“Shall we continue?” Seonghwa murmurs, breath fanning over Hongjoong’s face. He wants to say no. He wants to say no so badly. What he does want to say is: ‘take me back to your car immediately and fuck me in the backseat.’

But he doesn’t say that. He just nods and allows Seonghwa to hold his hand as they carry on their walk.

The rest of the date passes in a blur. They get ice cream (Hongjoong pays before Seonghwa can even get his wallet out), skip rocks on the river (Seonghwa’s unexpectedly good at it), and kiss some more (sometimes with tongue, to Hongjoong’s delight).

By the time they leave, the sun is setting; the oranges, reds and yellows of the sky dance on Seonghwa’s skin as he concentrates on the road. Seonghwa’s hand is once again in Hongjoong’s lap, their fingers woven together. This date is unequivocally the best date that Hongjoong has ever had in his life.

To save him from commuting home, Seonghwa insists that he drive Hongjoong back to his apartment. Before he knows it, Seonghwa is pulling up to his building, and Hongjoong can feel the disappointment wash over him as he realizes their date is about to come to a close.

“Would you like to come up?” The words slip out before Hongjoong can stop them, and Seonghwa whips his head to the side so fast Hongjoong’s sure he’s got mild whiplash.

Shit.

He’s totally going to say no, and Hongjoong is going to be mortified and have to cry himself to sleep because of how badly he’s just embarrassed-

“Yes,” Seonghwa breathes, and Hongjoong’s guts twist immediately at the whisper.

He actually agreed. Fuck.

Seonghwa parks his car and they walk to the building together, hand in hand. Soon after, Hongjoong is pushing open the door to his dinky little apartment and letting Seonghwa in. He’s suddenly very aware of how expensive Seonghwa looks standing amongst all his secondhand furniture.

Hongjoong feels like he’s in a dream as Seonghwa wanders through his living room and kitchen, just taking everything in while Hongjoong cowers in a corner.

It’s fucking terrifying. Seonghwa’s face is completely neutral, giving away no indication of emotion whatsoever. Hongjoong thinks Seonghwa would probably be a really great poker player.

It seems like Seonghwa’s made himself at home when he opens Hongjoong’s fridge and pulls out a bottle of soju and two glasses from the cupboard. He holds them out to Hongjoong, asking the question with his eyes, which are shining under quirked eyebrows.

Hongjoong nods in response and gestures to his couch, which Seonghwa settles into after slinging off his leather jacket and throwing it onto the armchair pressed into the corner of the small living room.

Hongjoong follows suit, and soon the two are downing glasses of soju while watching some wildly inappropriate cartoon that Hongjoong’s never heard of (Large Mouth? Big Jaw?).

“So,” Seonghwa starts, Hongjoong tensing up almost immediately. The soju is beginning to take effect, and Hongjoong knows that when he’s tipsy he becomes ridiculously honest. It’s something he learned in college, after a cute friend asked a tipsy Hongjoong what he wanted to eat, and Hongjoong replied promptly with “your dick.” That friend brought Hongjoong a slice of pizza and was never heard from again (mainly because Hongjoong avoided him like the plague for the remainder of his college career).

“Is there a specific reason why you invited me up?” Seonghwa asks as he pours another shot for the two of them.

_Don’t say it, don’t say it, don’t say it._

“I didn’t want our date to end,” Hongjoong blurts out. Damn, his brain-to-mouth filter really clocked out early today.

Seonghwa’s eyes become crescents as he hides his growing smile behind his glass of soju. The doctor’s cheeks are red from the alcohol, and Hongjoong thinks he looks fucking gorgeous.

“You’re so fucking gorgeous,” Hongjoong clamps his hands over his mouth as soon as the words spill out.

_Did he really just fucking say that? To Seonghwa’s face?!_

Seonghwa begins to laugh, shoulders shaking as he replies. “You’re not too bad yourself, Nurse Kim.”

Hongjoong is mortified. He’s beyond mortified. He can’t even look Seonghwa in the eyes. All he wants to do is curl up into a ball and disappear.

“God, I just want to disappear,” Hongjoong whines as he falls back, head nearly knocking against the armrest of his old couch. He yanks one of the throw pillows over his face and starts internally screaming as Seonghwa’s chuckles turn into a full-blown laughing fit.

“Come back to me, love,” Seonghwa gently tries to pull away the pillow from Hongjoong to no avail. The smaller man has it in a death grip, and he actually does start screaming into the worn material at Seonghwa’s nonchalant use of a pet name.

“Dear god, Hongjoong are you okay?” Seonghwa gives up completely and just lies on top of Hongjoong, laughing uncontrollably. If Hongjoong is No Filter Nancy when he’s tipsy, then it seems that Seonghwa is Completely Useless Cathy, because he does absolutely nothing to actually make Hongjoong feel better.

Seonghwa’s stomach is pressed against Hongjoong’s knees, and his head is resting on Hongjoong’s chest as he continues to snigger.

_Yeah, definitely not helping._

“Why the fuck would you say that?” Hongjoong gives up hiding his face in favour of thumping the pillow against Seonghwa’s head.

“Say what?” Seonghwa weakly tries to counter the attacks to no avail, choosing to just lay there and take the beating.

“Why would you call me ‘love’?” Hongjoong wails. He flings the pillow aside and begins his assault anew, poking at Seonghwa’s cheeks and pulling strands of his hair lightly. This only prompts Seonghwa to dig his face further into Hongjoong’s chest, the doctor’s sharp nose pressed against his sternum.

Even through the material of his sweater, Hongjoong can feel the hot breath leaving Seonghwa’s mouth against his abdomen. It’s driving him completely crazy.

“You’re driving me crazy, Seonghwa,” Hongjoong moans, doubling his attack. Seonghwa stills as he continues his assault, but Hongjoong’s pays it no mind as he squeezes the soft flesh of Seonghwa’s cheek between his fingers.

The doctor grabs Hongjoong’s hands before he can pinch his arms and pins them above his head.

Seonghwa shuffles up so that his face is above Hongjoong’s, their bodies flush. They’re both panting, but for entirely different reasons.

Seonghwa is breathless from laughing so hard, his cheeks still rosy. What makes Hongjoong stop in his tracks, however, is the dark look in the eyes of the man above him. The man that has Hongjoong utterly at his mercy.

It’s a dangerous glint that makes Hongjoong’s heart race and his breath punch out of him. There’s a spark in Seonghwa’s eyes that promises to ignite into a raging wildfire, and it scares and excites Hongjoong in equal parts.

Their chests press together as the two of them huff for breath, Seonghwa shifting slightly and brushing their crotches together almost imperceptibly.

“Say it again,” Seonghwa practically growls, and it sends blood rushing straight to Hongjoong’s cock.

_Oh, shit._

“Say what again?” Hongjoong whimpers, and the spark in Seonghwa’s eyes fans into a flame.

“Tell me I drive you crazy,” Seonghwa leans down and says the words right into Hongjoong’s ear, lips catching his earlobe for a split second.

_Fuckfuckfuck._

Hongjoong figures he wants him to say it exactly how he did before, so that’s what he does.

“You drive me crazy, Park Seonghwa,” Hongjoong moans purposefully this time, awestruck as Seonghwa’s pupils blow out until his eyes are almost entirely black.

Yep. Hongjoong’s officially half hard without Seonghwa even touching him.

“If you don’t want this, I need you to tell me right now,” Seonghwa’s voice lowers until it rumbles in his chest. It’s when he can feel the vibrations from Seonghwa’s chest against his that Hongjoong snaps and wholly loses his sanity.

“Fuck Seonghwa, I want this so fucking badly and if you don’t take me to my room and fuck me until I can’t walk right now then-“ Hongjoong is cut off as Seonghwa pounces.

This kiss is unlike the kisses they shared in the park. No, this is something else entirely. Some demon has taken over sweet Seonghwa and is threatening to suck the very soul from Hongjoong’s body.

The kiss is a clash of teeth and tongues and pure desperation. Seonghwa parts Hongjoong’s lips and begins sucking on the smaller man’s tongue with no preamble. Hongjoong’s hands, now free from Seonghwa’s grasp, flail and find their place in Seonghwa’s hair, anchoring him there.

He moans unreservedly into Seonghwa’s mouth, having seen the effect it had on the man before, and Seonghwa responds by biting on Hongjoong’s bottom lip and tugging it none too gently.

Seonghwa’s hair is as soft as it looks as Hongjoong gathers the locks in generous handfuls, pulling experimentally. Seonghwa’s reaction is unprecedented. The groan he lets out echoes in Hongjoong’s mouth, and Seonghwa grinds down onto him. Hard.

They pull apart with a gasp, the incredible sensation taking them both by surprise. Seonghwa’s hands find their way behind Hongjoong’s back before yanking the two of them upright, chests flush and noses knocking together lightly.

“Last chance to back out, Joong,” Seonghwa tries to find some semblance of control over the trembling in voice. “I need to know you won’t regret this.”

“I won’t. I’m tipsy, but I’m not drunk. I’m aware of the decision I’m making. So if you will now kindly fuck me into my mattress, I would greatly appreciate it,” Hongjoong lunges forward before Seonghwa can answer, kissing him ardently. The doctor responds by tightening his grip around Hongjoong and parting his lips for Hongjoong’s tongue.

Seonghwa gets to his feet without removing his lips from Hongjoong’s, and the moment they are both standing, Seonghwa reaches down to the back of Hongjoong’s thighs. He jumps up at the silent order, securing his legs around Seonghwa’s waist as hands come to grip at his ass.

Hongjoong is not entirely sure how they make it to his room without bowling over anything, but Seonghwa is kicking the door closed behind him in no time, their tongues still tangling together in a frantic dance to just get closer.

Hongjoong takes the liberty of removing himself from Seonghwa’s hold, chest heaving as he pulls Seonghwa towards his bed. He turns the two of them around, backing Seonghwa up until the mattress hits the back of his legs and he drops his weight with a soft thump onto the memory foam.

Hongjoong straddles him without a second thought, hands finding the hem of Seonghwa’s t-shirt after dragging it from the confines of his tight jeans. He rucks the soft material up Seonghwa’s chest, Seonghwa raising his arms to aid Hongjoong in his quest to get him naked as soon as possible.

Seonghwa’s body is just as beautiful as his face. It’s all honey-toned hard lines and soft edges, and Hongjoong wants to taste all of it. He doesn’t realize he’s staring and not doing enough to satisfy Seonghwa until the man beneath him makes a noise of impatience and buries his face into Hongjoong’s neck, licking and biting the expanse of skin not still hidden by his sweater.

“Your turn,” the words growled by his ear are barely a warning before Seonghwa flips them over and gets to work on Hongjoong’s pants. He slips off his sweater as Seonghwa begins to pull the denim from his hips, but he quickly knocks Seonghwa’s hands out of the way.

“I’ll do it. You take off yours.”

Not the sexiest line, Hongjoong will admit, but it gets the job done. Seonghwa yanks his own skin-tight jeans off of his legs and tosses it over his shoulder as Hongjoong does much the same with his own pair, the two of them left wearing only their underwear.

Seonghwa clambers back atop of Hongjoong, who welcomes him with open arms. They go right back to making out, Hongjoong’s hands running roughly through Seonghwa’s hair.

Seonghwa’s fingers trace down Hongjoong’s body gently, tickling his sides. He outlines the barely-there vee of Hongjoong’s hips before travelling back up and brushing over the smaller man’s erect nipples.

The reaction it elicits is beautiful.

Hongjoong bows up into his touch, eyes skewed shut as he chases the feeling. Seonghwa smirks at his new discovery, abandoning Hongjoong’s lips in favour of leaving wet kisses down his neck and chest.

He knows he’s in for it when Seonghwa latches onto a nipple and sucks like his life depends on it. He can feel Seonghwa grazing his teeth over the sensitive bud, biting gently before laving over it with his hot tongue. It’s just too much; Hongjoong arches his back in a desperate attempt to get him closer, but Seonghwa’s strong hands circle his waist and hold him down, allowing the man to suck and bite and lick at his leisure.

Usually, Hongjoong isn’t loud in bed. He’s more of a pant and whimper kind of guy, and that’s just the way it’s always been. He’s never had college roommates making fun of his sex sounds or noise complaints from neighbors, but all that might just fly out the window tonight. Seonghwa has him moaning so loud and so lewdly that he could definitely give a pornstar a run for their money.

“Shit- Seonghwa, don’t fucking stop,” Hongjoong’s hands fly up to grip at his own hair as Seonghwa switches nipples. Seonghwa’s mouth is pink and swollen and slick with spit, and fuck Hongjoong wants those lips around his cock.

“I want your lips around my cock.”

_Fucking alcohol._

Seonghwa’s head comes up to lock his eyes with Hongjoong’s. A flurry of emotions overwhelms Hongjoong- embarrassment, mainly- but his lust for Seonghwa quickly overcomes that as the doctor bites his bottom lip.

“As you wish, love.”

Hongjoong shudders at the term of endearment, a whine leaving him involuntarily. Seonghwa’s hands move to the elastic of his briefs, tugging it away before allowing it snap back into place. His mouth is hot against Hongjoong’s abdomen as he works his way down, licking and nipping at Hongjoong’s flesh until love bites bloom in hues of red and purple across his torso.

Seonghwa reaches his destination, not bothering to remove Hongjoong’s briefs and just mouthing at his dick through the soft material. Hongjoong’s legs draw apart automatically, making more room for Seonghwa to nestle himself there. Seonghwa’s hands come to rest on his inner thighs, scratching the flesh lightly and making the muscles jump with the stimulation.

Seonghwa suckles earnestly at the head of Hongjoong’s cock over the briefs, a wet patch of precum and saliva forming that makes Hongjoong feel absolutely filthy.

“N-need more,” Hongjoong hands shoot to Seonghwa’s silken hair, tugging gently to get his attention.

A groan rips from Seonghwa’s throat, the vibrations travelling down Hongjoong’s dick as Seonghwa’s jaw goes slack, allowing Hongjoong’s clothed cock to rest heavy on his tongue.

Oh right. Seonghwa has a thing for hair-pulling. _Noted_.

“Do you want me to take these off, baby?” Seonghwa pulls back slightly, hooking his fingers under the waistband and dragging it down slightly.

“Yes, yes please Seonghwa. I need your mouth, please.”

_Ok, so we’re begging now. It’s happening._

“Please, I want more. I want your mouth on me, it feels so good. Make me cum Seonghwa, please,” Hongjoong whimpers, gazing at Seonghwa through his lashes. Seonghwa freezes at his simpering, eyes wide and vantablack. He scans Hongjoong, an indistinguishable emotion flitting across his face before finally (to Hongjoong’s utter relief) smirking.

“Ok, baby boy. Let me make you feel good,” Seonghwa’s hands are on him in a flash, yanking his briefs off unceremoniously and letting them fly off the edge of the bed.

Seonghwa’s fingers knead into his hips as he settles back onto his stomach, Hongjoong’s freed cock twitching against his abdomen with every press of Seonghwa’s long digits into his flesh. He can feel Seonghwa’s warm breath ghost over him, and that’s all the notice he gets before he’s engulfed into the scorching heat of Seonghwa’s mouth.

Hongjoong’s not the biggest or the smallest guy. His dick is pretty average in length with a decent girth; he’s never had anyone complain about it before, anyhow. However, even with his average length, he wouldn’t expect anyone to deep-throat him in one go.

Seonghwa is apparently the guy that keeps on giving as he allows Hongjoong’s cock hit the back of his throat, the muscles of his mouth constricting almost painfully around Hongjoong as he holds him there and swallows. Over and over.

Hongjoong is a shaking, moaning mess. This is unlike anything he’s ever experienced. Seonghwa’s mouth is fucking _incredible_.

Hongjoong can feel the hot coil of an orgasm already forming deep in his belly as Seonghwa bobs his head up and down Hongjoong’s length. He lets one hand rest in Seonghwa’s hair while he props himself up slightly with his other arm, resting on an elbow.

He was right.

Seonghwa’s lips do look beautiful wrapped around his cock.

The moment that Seonghwa sinks down to his base again, Hongjoong twists his fingers into Seonghwa’s hair and tugs.

He’s rewarded so, so beautifully as a moan tears from Seonghwa’s throat and sends delicious vibrations straight to his cock, which remains engulfed to the base in Seonghwa’s warm mouth. His back bows off the bed as he pulls again and again, Seonghwa obliging him with his world-shattering moans and groans every single time.

Hongjoong is brought to the precipice of orgasm all too quickly, his hips now jerking uncontrollably in Seonghwa’s grip and attempting to desperately bury his cock even deeper in the wet heat of his throat. Seonghwa just _lets him_ , loosening his grip and hollowing out his cheeks.

It becomes too much and Hongjoong can barely breathe out a warning before his body tenses and he’s shooting stream after stream of cum into Seonghwa’s waiting mouth. He swears he stops breathing as his orgasm washes over him in undulating waves, the very air around him trembling as he gasps and pants, trying to catch the breath that Seonghwa stole from him.

The man between his legs apparently has other plans as he just continues to suckle at the head of Hongjoong’s cock, milking him for all he’s got. Hongjoong could swear that this is the hardest he’s ever cum in his life. Seonghwa coaxes spurt after spurt out of him until it’s a pathetic trickling stream and Hongjoong is whining from the overstimulation.

Seonghwa pulls off and tilts his head to the side, laving up the last of Hongjoong’s cum before pressing kisses into his hips.

“You okay, love?” Seonghwa lays his head against Hongjoong’s thigh, rubbing circles into the flesh there with his thumbs. It’s unbelievably sweet, considering the absolutely vulgar things he was doing with his mouth not ten seconds ago.

And Hongjoong is definitely not okay. No ma’am.

He’s beyond okay.

He’s fucking spectacular.

His stomach is still tensed with the intensity of his orgasm, and his mind is muddled in a post-orgasm haze. He barely registers Seonghwa’s question, and it takes him an embarrassingly long time to come up with an answer.

“Yeah, I’m okay,” Hongjoong’s hand runs through Seonghwa’s hair delicately, fingers trembling ever so softly.

“Do you have a safe word, love?”

Seonghwa moves Hongjoong’s leg until it’s bent at a right angle against the bed, creating more room for him to shift and pull himself up to look at Hongjoong’s scarlet face.

“I just use the traffic lights. Why?”

“What’s your colour?” Seonghwa crawls up Hongjoong’s body until his face is above Hongjoong’s, his swollen lips pulled up in the corners.

_God he’s beautiful._

“You’re so beautiful.”

 _Jesus fucking Christ_.

Seonghwa laughs, eyes crinkling into crescents as he leans down to press a kiss to Hongjoong’s lips. Hongjoong can still taste himself in Seonghwa’s mouth as their tongues tangle together briefly. A warmth spreads through Hongjoong’s chest as his hands come up to scratch tenderly at Seonghwa’s shoulders, the man above him pulling back and bumping their noses together sweetly.

“Thank you, but that doesn’t answer my question,” Seonghwa chuckles, kissing Hongjoong’s chin and jaw.

“Uh, what was the question again?”

One, two, three soft kisses against Hongjoong’s mouth.

“What’s your colour, baby boy?” Seonghwa nuzzles his nose into Hongjoong’s neck.

“Green. So fucking green,” Hongjoong breathes out as Seonghwa comes back up to look at him, smirking devilishly.

“Good.”

In all his distraction, Hongjoong hadn’t noticed Seonghwa’s hand travel back down between his legs. It grips his still semi-hard cock and Hongjoong nearly screams.

“Holy _fuck-_ “ Hongjoong’s body jerks as Seonghwa crawls down to spit on his cock, the warm saliva spread over his overstimulated length by Seonghwa’s relentless grip.

Seonghwa jerks him hard and fast and Hongjoong reaches down to claw at Seonghwa’s forearm.

This does nothing to slow him down; in fact, it feels like he tightens his grasp ever so slightly, the wet sound of him moving up and down Hongjoong ringing in his ears like an alarm. This orgasm blindsides Hongjoong, appearing in a flash of light behind his closed eyelids and paralyzing him completely.

He doesn’t know how it’s possible, but cum shoots out of him harder than before, painting his stomach and Seonghwa’s hand with white streaks. He can barely choke out a sob as Seonghwa keeps going, drawing the liquid out of Hongjoong’s body until he’s seeing double and can hardly remember his own name.

Seonghwa stops when Hongjoong’s dick goes soft, twitching pitifully against his thigh from the abuse. Hongjoong’s torso is a piece of art: red and purple love bites glazed over with splashes of translucent, iridescent silver.

Hongjoong is hyperventilating and tears are streaming down the side of his face. His breaths hiccup out of him as he tries to focus on Seonghwa between his legs. The doctor sits back on his heels and brings his soiled hand to his mouth, sucking Hongjoong’s cum off of his fingers.

He looks like he’s having a Michelin star meal, humming in satisfaction as he licks the milky white substance from his fingers, his gaze never leaving Hongjoong’s.

When his hand is clean, his attention drops to the puddles of cum gathered in the slope of Hongjoong’s stomach. Seonghwa leans forward and dips his finger into Hongjoong’s cum, gathering a fair amount on his fingers before shifting his attention back to Hongjoong’s face.

“Colour?”

“Green.”

Seonghwa’s hand comes up and he slips his fingers into Hongjoong waiting mouth, the smaller man immediately wrapping his lips around the digits and swallowing his own cum. He hollows out his cheeks and sucks Seonghwa’s fingers with abandon.

Seonghwa seems satisfied with Hongjoong’s ministrations, pulling his fingers out and kissing Hongjoong softly on the forehead.

“You did good, baby boy,” Seonghwa whispers as he runs a hand through Hongjoong’s hair. His eyes fall shut at the motions, whimpering as he feels Seonghwa’s body heat move away from him. The bed dips as Seonghwa climbs off and walks out of the room, only to come back in shortly with a damp towel. His touch is gentle as he wipes the tears from Hongjoong’s cheeks and the cum from his chest.

Seonghwa throws the towel into his laundry hamper, and Hongjoong hears him moving around. The tell-tale sound of a zipper is all it takes to snap Hongjoong out of his haze.

“Wait, where are you going?” Hongjoong’s voice is scratchy as he whips his head in Seonghwa’s direction, the man already half dressed. Seonghwa looks at him with a raised brow.

“Home?”

Hongjoong’s bottom lip involuntarily juts out and he curls back in on himself.

What was he thinking asking Seonghwa that? Of course he would want to go home. This was only the first date and it’s not like they’re official, so Seonghwa isn’t obligated-

“Actually, it _is_ kind of late,” Seonghwa has a knowing smile on his face as he watches Hongjoong pout and wrap the comforter around himself.

Hongjoong’s gaze snaps back to Seonghwa’s face. He knows that Seonghwa is taking pity on his pathetic ass at this point, but he takes the bait anyway.

“You can stay the night. I don’t mind,” Hongjoong knows that Seonghwa isn’t going to refuse him, but he still can’t help the pure delight he feels when Seonghwa tugs off his pants again and settles himself under the comforter with Hongjoong.

Seonghwa pulls Hongjoong closer, his back pressing against Seonghwa’s chest as strong arms come to wrap around him. Seonghwa’s warmth envelopes Hongjoong, and he’s never felt more comfortable in someone’s arms. He’s never felt this _safe_.

In a matter of moments, Hongjoong’s breathing evens out, the exhaustion from multiple orgasms catching up with him. Sleep claims him as he nuzzles deeper into Seonghwa’s hold, craving the feel of him. Seonghwa grips him tighter as they drift off, together.

ooooo

When Seonghwa gets home the next day, it’s well past noon and he’s utterly exhausted. Hongjoong had decided to wake him up in a rather unorthodox way.

He was ripped out of his dream at the sensation of warm heat between his legs.

When he finally wrenched open his eyes and looked down, his field of vision narrowed in on Hongjoong kneeling between his legs, ass in the air, and Seonghwa’s dick lodged in his throat. Hongjoong looked up at him from there, watching Seonghwa through his lashes as he ran his mouth up and down Seonghwa’s length.

He was considerably longer than Hongjoong, but it didn’t seem to pose a problem for the smaller man as he brought his hand up and wrapped it around the part of Seonghwa’s cock that couldn’t fit into his throat. He twisted his grip, moving his wrist up and down in tandem with his mouth and Seonghwa swore he could come right then and there.

Hongjoong popped off his length to take one of his balls into his mouth, rolling it around with his tongue and sucking it gently. The pleasure was so intense that flames licked at his stomach in no time, warning him of his impending orgasm.

Seonghwa refused to cum this quickly. Instead, he gently pulled Hongjoong off of him and guided him onto his back, the smaller man’s head hanging off the side of the bed. Seonghwa rolled out of the bed, still a little unsteady as he shook off the dregs of sleep. He shifted so that his dick stood tall above Hongjoong’s face, the man below him already waiting for him with an open mouth.

“What’s your colour?” Seonghwa’s voice was rough from sleep, and he could swear he saw Hongjoong’s cock twitch out of the corner of his eye.

“Green.”

Hongjoong outstretched his arms and clasped his hands around the back of Seonghwa’s thighs, dragging him closer eagerly.

“Tap my thigh twice if it becomes too much.”

Hongjoong nods in understanding as Seonghwa finally slides his cock between Hongjoong lips.

He started slow at first, thrusting shallowly as Hongjoong hollowed out his cheeks and relaxed his throat. Not long after, Seonghwa started a comfortable pace, watching as Hongjoong’s neck bulged with every thrust of Seonghwa’s hips.

The sound of Hongjoong gagging around him was music to his ears as he came, buried deep in Hongjoong’s mouth and throat. When he pulled out, Hongjoong was gasping and his cheeks were a rosy pink, his chin covered in saliva and cum; Seonghwa had to admit it was a phenomenal view first thing in the morning.

Now, Seonghwa hangs up his jacket and trudges into his bathroom, his clothes still smelling of Hongjoong.

The nurse is definitely not what he expected. Hongjoong is sweet and easy to talk to; it’s as if he’s a whole different person outside of work.

And his mouth? Good lord, Seonghwa wouldn’t mind another date with Hongjoong if it meant he’d have those beautiful lips and talented tongue on him by the end of the night.

He turns on his shower and strips off his clothes, his cock already half hard again at just the thought of Hongjoong’s mouth wrapped around him again. The hot water is welcome on his sore body. Their activities the previous night hadn’t been overly strenuous, but it has been a while since Seonghwa had spent the night with anyone, and it had certainly taken a toll.

He rolls his shoulders under the nearly scalding spray, massaging the aching muscles with his hands.

Seonghwa can feel Hongjoong’s scent leaving him, the sweat and grime of their activities being washed away by scented bubbles, circling down the drain. He steps out of the shower red and raw, fingers pruning at the tips. Wrapping a towel around his waist, Seonghwa plops a dollop of toothpaste on his toothbrush and begins scrubbing away at his teeth, picking his phone up off the bathroom counter to scroll through his messages.

There are 3 new messages from San hidden in an avalanche of Twitter and Instagram notifications, and Seonghwa clicks on them already knowing what they’re going to say.

**11:23 pm**

_**I take it the date is going well? ;)** _

**2:17 am**

_**Mission accomplished, finally got to fuck Wooyoung :D** _

_**Thanks for taking one for the team, hyung** _

Seonghwa rolls his eyes as he types out a reply.

**[To: Sa(ta)n]**

**2:02 pm**

_**No problem** _

_**I had my own fun last night ;)** _

A grey bubble pops up at the bottom left-hand corner of the screen as San types his reply. Seonghwa sets his phone back down on the counter as he finishes up, the device dinging as message after message pours into his inbox from San.

Seonghwa walks to his bedroom, running a towel over his wet hair before flopping onto his bed from utter exhaustion. His phone continues its obnoxious chiming, San having evidently moved their conversation to the group chat so Yunho can occasionally interject with keyboard smashes and inappropriate emojis.

The conversation is mainly just San giving unnecessary detail about what he did to Wooyoung in bed, interspersed with garbled nonsense from Yunho.

**{Group Chat: San & da bois}**

**[Idiot #1]**

_**Fuck, Wooyoung was incredible guys** _

_**I’ve never had someone take my dick that well before** _

_**Its like he was literally made for me** _

**[Idiot #1.5]**

_**OOOUUUOououuoOUOu** _

_**DID YOU DO THE SANI SPECIAL???!!!?!** _

**[Idiot #1]**

_**Hell yeah I did** _

_**We both came like three times last night and this morning ;)** _

**[Idiot #1.5]**

_**YAS BOI GET IT** _

_**SEONGHWA HYUNG HOW WAS YOUR DATE???** _

**[Me]**

_**It went almost as well as San’s ;)** _

**[Idiot #1.5]**

_**GIVE. US. DETAILS** _

**[Idiot #1]**

_**I take full credit for finally ending the Seonghwa sex drought btw** _

**[Me]**

_**We didn’t fuck, but I made him cum until he cried** _

_**And I got to fuck his throat this morning soooo** _

**[Idiot #1]**

_**THATS OUR BOY** _

**[Idiot #1.5]**

_**ASDFGHJKL IM SO PROUD OF YOU SON** _

**[Me]**

_**I have to say San, this wasn’t one of your worst ideas** _

_**It definitely isn’t one of the best** _

_**But it isn’t horrible** _

**[Idiot #1]**

_**I know, I’m a genius** _

**[Me]**

_**Ehhhhhh idk about that** _

**[Idiot #1.5]**

_**Genius is pushing it a bit, dontchu think San?** _

**[Idiot #1]**

_**Fuck both of you, first of all** _

_**Second, congrats hyung, I’ve decided to keep Wooyoung around for a little bit longer** _

_**That means you can fuck Hongjoong’s to your heart’s content, or at least until one of us gets bored ;D** _

Seonghwa locks his phone and tosses it somewhere on his bed, the electronic device landing with a soft thump. If he’d been apprehensive about San’s plan before, all doubts had now dissolved, leaving only the image of Hongjoong writhing in pleasure beneath him.

Seonghwa is glad he agreed in the end, regardless of the morally questionable nature of the deal. He had good time on the date, easily slipping back into his flirty persona; it was not difficult to see that Hongjoong had been wooed from the beginning, and that made Seonghwa’s chest swell with a pride he hasn’t felt in a long while

As he drifts off, he can still feel Hongjoong’s touch lingering on his skin, the soft press of his lips against Seonghwa’s. When he dreams, it’s about the two of them; specifically about all the things he could do to Hongjoong to make him cry again, all wrecked and beautiful. When he wakes hours later, his fingers itch to send Hongjoong a text and set another date.

When he finally does, Hongjoong replies almost immediately and it makes Seonghwa grin involuntarily.

Did he happen to have his phone in his hands, or was Hongjoong waiting for Seonghwa to message?

Hongjoong suggests the date this time, and they chat until the wee hours of the morning.

When Seonghwa succumbs to sleep yet again, it’s dreamless.

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I am a slow updater  
> Pls come yell at me on twt for it @useumssi  
> Kudos, comments and concrit would be appreciated!  
> Until next time (・∀・)


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been a long time coming, but here we are!  
> I hope you enjoy, as this is most likely the second-last chapter of this little story!  
> This was also not beta-read, so please forgive any mistakes you find (I wrote most of this shit at like 4am OTL)

The next month is admittedly quite possibly the happiest Seonghwa has been in a very long time.

Work is going great, and he’s learning a great deal from Dr. Min. Every situation that’s been thrown their way, they were able to handle like a well-oiled machine. It became easier to ask the right questions, to pick up the subtleties of each client, and to react in a life-and-death circumstance- although those had been few and far between.

San has been considerably more tolerable as well; it seems Wooyoung has fallen deeply for his friend’s charms, and while part of him wants to warn the poor nurse to stay away, the other half of him wants to be selfish. As long as San is occupied with Wooyoung, the longer Seonghwa has Hongjoong to keep his bed warm.

It’s become a pretty good system. San will inform Seonghwa whenever he plans his activities with Wooyoung, and Seonghwa whisks Hongjoong away for a date at the same time, leaving the overprotective nurse otherwise preoccupied as San has his way with Wooyoung.

And both nurses remain none the wiser to their machinations.

Seonghwa watches Hongjoong from across the nursing station now. It’s nearly the end of a tiring night shift; the two of them have been occupied with paperwork and documentation for the better part of the night. Their breaks haven’t matched up either, so beyond a greeting smile and wave a couple hours before, the pair haven’t said two words to each other.

Seonghwa leans back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head as Dr. Min finishes showing them the admission and discharge protocol and the various forms they have to sign before sending a client to another unit. It’s beyond tedious, to say the least.

From the corner of his eye, he sees Hongjoong clamber out his chair and place a patient chart back in its spot before walking out of the nursing station, shoes squeaking against the freshly mopped floor as he makes his way to the break room. With an hour left until shift change, the room should be empty, everyone having already taken their breaks for the night. Before Seonghwa can consider why, he’s pushing out of his chair and trailing after Hongjoong in what he hopes is a subtle manner.

Clearly it isn’t working when San looks over at him from where he’s set up camp to do some reading and sends a wink in Seonghwa’s direction. He rolls his eyes in response, but slows down his pace regardless.

As far as he knows, San isn’t going out with Wooyoung anytime soon; there really is no reason for Seonghwa to be following Hongjoong, or to want to talk to him, or to want to kiss him. All the same, Seonghwa meanders down the hallway until he’s silently pressing the door of the break room closed behind him.

Hongjoong is standing by the sink, filling his water bottle with the filter they keep in the fridge. Judging by the way he hasn’t so much as shifted his position, he doesn’t realize he isn’t alone. Seonghwa’s heart warms as he watches Hongjoong hold up the heavy filter with both hands, tipping it carefully over his bottle.

Over the month they’ve spent together, Seonghwa has learned that he genuinely does like Hongjoong. If it were not for the current situation, he has a feeling that he and Hongjoong would have gotten along swimmingly as colleagues, or even as friends. Talking with Hongjoong comes easily to Seonghwa. Making him laugh is even easier.

Seonghwa silently shuffles over to Hongjoong, waiting until the man has placed the heavy water filter down on the counter before wrapping his arms around Hongjoong’s tiny waist. He jumps in surprise at the contact but relaxes instantly, Seonghwa’s now-familiar form molding into his like butter. Hongjoong’s scent is comfortable as Seonghwa noses into the crook of his neck. Sweet like vanilla, and something distinctly _Hongjoong_.

“I miss you,” Seonghwa whispers, kissing the lobe of Hongjoong’s ear lightly. A shudder passes through Hongjoong’s body as he tightens his hold around the nurse’s waist.

It isn’t a lie. Although they met mainly when it fit San’s dick appointment schedule, their dates were quite frequent. Hongjoong has inserted himself as more than a temporary presence in Seonghwa’s personal life, and more often than not, he finds himself thinking about the midnight-haired man and reaching for his phone to send a message with no real purpose.

“I miss you, too,” Hongjoong’s hands come to rest atop of Seonghwa’s, fingers intertwining. He tilts his head as Seonghwa presses soft kisses where his neck meets his shoulder, humming quietly with every press of lips against skin.

“What are you doing today?'' The question surprises Seonghwa as it falls from his lips. He doesn’t need to occupy Hongjoong for San- not for the next couple of days, at least.

“I was planning on catching up on some sleep,” Hongjoong says as he turns around in Seonghwa’s hold, looping his arms around his neck. “Unless… you have other ideas?”

The suggestion is clear in the way Hongjoong’s voice drops, and in the way he pushes up on his toes to press his lips against the corner of Seonghwa’s mouth. It’s Seonghwa’s turn to shudder as his grip falls to Hongjoong’s ass. He does little more than rest his hands over the curve of plump flesh, but it garners a reaction from Hongjoong all the same.

Hongjoong arches himself in Seonghwa’s hold, a whimper escaping him as their hips press together.

“I can come up with something,” Seonghwa grins as he pecks Hongjoong’s lips, enjoying the way the man is trying to rut against him languidly.

“My place? After work?”

 _Oh, that’s new_.

He’s never offered to host their dates at his own house before. Seonghwa usually takes Hongjoong out for lunch or dinner before making their way back to Hongjoong’s cozy apartment. Eat, talk, fuck, sleep; it’s become a reliable routine.

Seonghwa doesn’t know why in particular he’s never even suggested using his own flat as a rendezvous point. His bed is significantly bigger and comfier, and his post-sex meal selection is considerably better than Hongjoong’s (in that it doesn’t consist exclusively of ramen and Chinese takeout leftovers). And god knows Hongjoong would look like absolute sin all spread out on his bed, panting and sweating and begging Seonghwa for more.

“I’m okay with that,” Hongjoong whispers, pressing hip lips lightly against Seonghwa’s chin.

“Perfect.”

They stay like that for a moment longer, just feeling content to hold each other. It takes a great deal of effort on Seonghwa’s part to untangle himself from Hongjoong’s embrace; leaving his arms leaves Seonghwa feeling cold.

 _Hm, that’s new too_.

ooooo

When Seonghwa wakes up, Hongjoong is lying next to him, awake and scrolling through his phone quietly. He hasn’t noticed that Seonghwa’s joined the world of the living just yet, occasionally giggling at his screen and rapidly typing messages, presumably to Wooyoung. He watches through hooded eyes, sleep still threatening to drag him under again, with Hongjoong acting as his only tether to reality.

It’s soothing somehow, just lying there and watching Hongjoong be, well, Hongjoong.

When they’d reached Seonghwa’s apartment hours earlier, the exhaustion hit the pair like a freight train. They’d barely had enough energy to shower; Seonghwa swore Hongjoong had begun to doze off as he’d massaged shampoo into the nurse’s hair. They tangled together as they fell into bed soon after, hair still slightly damp and mussed. Hongjoong was wearing one of Seonghwa’s hoodies and a pair of boxers. Enticing couldn’t even begin to describe the way Hongjoong looks right now. 

His lips are swollen from sleep, looking kiss-bitten although Seonghwa has yet to touch him. His hair is messy and falling over his forehead in soft waves. It’s grown out quite a bit since Seonghwa first met him- enough for him to fist his hands into it when he feels like being rough as he takes Hongjoong from behind. The sleeves of his sweatshirt are way too long, the fabric gathering at Hongjoong’s knuckles as he types furiously, a shadow of concentration flitting across his face.

A low chuckle escapes his lips before he can tamp it down, and Hongjoong’s gaze jerks to him, eyes widening.

“How long have you been awake?” Hongjoong whispers, sliding down until he lays his head on the pillow next to Seonghwa. It’s almost automatic the way Seonghwa throws an arm around his tiny waist and pulls him flush against his chest. Hongjoong giggles, cheeks turning a rosy pink as he gazes up through his messy, midnight bangs. His eyes are full of adoration and it makes Seonghwa’s heart squeeze painfully in his chest.

“Not long… maybe five minutes?” Seonghwa’s voice is still deep and husky with sleep; he watches with wonder as Hongjoong’s pupils dilate, his body responding so viscerally to something as mundane as Seonghwa’s voice.

“You creep,” Hongjoong laughs, poking his finger gently at Seonghwa’s chest. His cheeks are a flaming red now, betraying him completely. Seonghwa slips a hand under the oversized sweater and drags his fingers up and down the notches of Hongjoong’s spine.

“Maybe, but you love it,” Seonghwa winks down at him as his fingers begin to descend, tugging playfully at the waistband of Hongjoong’s boxers. The smaller man smiles up at him sweetly, hips moving automatically to chase Seonghwa’s touch. He pushes his hand past the waistband, cupping Hongjoong’s pert bottom and kneading the flesh. Hongjoong gasps quietly, tensing in Seonghwa’s hold as his fingers begin to wander beneath the thin material, brushing softly against his hole and grazing his taint with a blunt finger nail. 

Seonghwa takes the hint when Hongjoong pushes his ass down insistently as his index finger brushes past the tight ring of muscle again. He tugs the boxers down Hongjoong’s milky legs, the man kicking them off before reaching up to pull the hoodie over his head. Seonghwa grabs his wrist gently and Hongjoong gazes at him with curious, lust-addled eyes.

“No… keep it on,” Seonghwa whispers, gaze roving down Hongjoong’s figure. The nurse isn’t too much smaller than him, but the oversized sweater comes down to Hongjoong’s mid-thigh and engulfs his smaller frame completely. It makes Seonghwa’s heart race, seeing Hongjoong in his clothing; it makes him feel like Hongjoong is _his_. 

Hongjoong nods dazedly as Seonghwa removes his grip for his wrist and pushes his own shorts from his hips, moving the blankets from their bodies in the process. Hongjoong sits and watches, eyes wandering up and down Seonghwa frame and drinking in the way his arms and back flex as he reaches over to his bedside drawer and pulls out a small bottle and condom packet. 

Seonghwa drops the items next to him before opening his arms to Hongjoong, the smaller man crawling into his lap immediately. His back is pressed against the headboard, a single pillow pressed between his body and the hard surface to cushion himself as Hongjoong goes lax in his arms.

Seonghwa captures his lips, their mouths opening and tongues dancing with a practiced ease. Hongjoong’s hips begin moving on their own, rotating in small circles and occasionally grinding down against Seonghwa’s hardening cock. Seonghwa grips Hongjoong’s tiny waist, using him as leverage to press up against Hongjoong as he undulates his hips. 

He feels Hongjoong’s hands crawl up his chest, rubbing gently at his nipples before they find their way to his hair, tangling there gently and tugging ever so slightly.

They’ve never done this before- the lazy sex. It’s always been hard and fast, the room filled with pants and gasps and the sound of skin slapping skin. But _this_ is unprecedented. Just holding Hongjoong like this, just feeling him in the moment makes Seonghwa heart swell. Warmth and satisfaction floods his body and it makes him feel like his head is floating in the clouds. 

Hongjoong pulls away first, chest heaving and a thin layer of sweat already glistening on his neck and face. His lips are swollen and red, the sheen of saliva covering them like a shiny gloss. Their gazes lock, Hongjoong eyes hooded with desire as his hips continue to move. Seonghwa bits his bottom lip to stifle the moans that threaten to spill over, but mainly because he knows it drives Hongjoong crazy.

Sure enough, Hongjoong’s eyes flicker down to his own swollen lips before lunging forward, this time kissing Seonghwa with abandon. His mouth is open and ready when Hongjoong’s tongue enters, the muscles twining together sloppily. Hongjoong groans openly into his mouth as Seonghwa moves one of his hands from the nurse’s waist to capture both of their cocks in his grip. 

Hongjoong thrusts forward, forgetting to kiss Seonghwa entirely and just panting into his mouth as Seonghwa’s hand tightens around them. He looks so beautiful, cheeks pink and already looking fucked out even though they’ve barely begun. Seonghwa smiles fondly before pressing his lips against Hongjoong’s forehead, picking up his pace as he does so.

Hongjoong groans and flops forward, burying his face in Seonghwa's neck and whimpering as the stimulation becomes too much. Seonghwa only pulls away when Hongjoong begs him to stop, already close to being thrown off the edge. 

He reaches over for the bottle of lube as Hongjoong breathes heavily against his shoulder, shuddering in his hold as he grips Seonghwa’s arms for dear life. He brings his free hand up, running his longer fingers gently through Hongjoong sweat-dampened hair as he deftly uncaps the bottle with his thumb. 

“Wait,” Hongjoong murmurs. “Let me.” 

Seonghwa quirks a brow as Hongjoong rights himself and holds out a hand for the small bottle. 

“Are you sure, baby boy?” Seonghwa asks gently, stroking the apple of Hongjoong’s cheek with a thumb. “I really don’t mind doing it.”

“Yeah, I’m sure,” Hongjoong reassures him with a soft smile. “I just want you to watch.”

 _Oh_. 

Seonghwa relinquishes the bottle, and the smaller man coats his fingers generously with the viscous liquid before allowing his hand to disappear beneath the oversized sweater. Hongjoong braces his other hand against Seonghwa’s shoulder, rising to his knees as he does and Seonghwa hears the tell-tale _squelch_ as Hongjoong’s own little fingers work his tight hole open. 

It so _sinful_ the way Hongjoong begins to writhe and gasp, his arm moving faster as he loses himself to the pleasure. He shifts back, using his arm to hold him up and he plants his feet on the bed next to Seonghwa’s hips and _oh my_.

From what Seonghwa can see, Hongjoong is fucking himself with three fingers, the lube running down his taint and wrist in thick streams. 

“F-fuck Seonghwa, I wa-want you to fill me up now,” Hongjoong moans as he throws his head back, legs shaking at Seonghwa’s side as he brings himself close to the edge. His fingers disappear inside of him even faster than before and his hips push forward to meet them, the sticky sound of lube overwhelming Seonghwa’s senses.

It’s so unbelievably hot, watching Hongjoong please himself in Seonghwa’s lap. The lewdness of it all has Seonghwa’s cock standing at full attention, but the way Hongjoong’s face is flushed the most beautiful shade of pink, his indigo hair plastered to his forehead and eyes skewed shut in intense pleasure… it’s almost ethereal. 

Seonghwa’s holding an angel in his lap.

An angel that he’s most definitely going to fuck.

“Okay, baby boy come here,” Seonghwa coaxes, and almost immediately Hongjoong concedes, pulling his fingers from his hole and clambering back onto his knees. 

“Such a good boy for me, love.”

Hongjoong preens at the pet name and presses a hot kiss against Seonghwa’s mouth. Seonghwa reaches out blindly for the condom packet as Hongjoong preoccupies him with his tongue. AT the sound of the metallic foil tearing, Hongjoong pulls away.

“I want to try it… without the condom,” he whispers shyly. His gaze is locked with Seonghwa’s, the intensity of it almost making Seonghwa want to look away. 

“Are you sure, love?” Seonghwa asks, stroking Hongjoong’s cheek idly. The man tilts his head into the tender touch, peering at Seonghwa through long lashes before nodding.

“I’m sure.”

It’s all he needs to throw the condom aside and line himself up with Hongjoong. He can feel the tight ring of muscle flutter in protest, but it gives way easily as Hongjoong lowers himself smoothly onto Seonghwa’s aching cock. He sighs as he bottoms out, leaning forward and burying his face into Seonghwa’s chest, the two of them breathing heavily despite not moving at all. 

The feeling of Hongjoong’s bare walls is fucking heavenly. It’s like being held in a velvet-lined vice, the muscles jumping and contracting against his bare skin. He’s _inside_ Hongjoong. There is nothing between them now, and that thought sends a flood of emotion through Seonghwa. 

He thinks back to all their time together. It’s only been a month and it all started as a stupid favour, but Seonghwa can see now that it’s much more than that. The ease of their conversation, the itching he gets to tell Hongjoong when something funny happens, the intense want he feels whenever he sees the nurse… Seonghwa likes Hongjoong. He _likes_ Hongjoong.

Soenghwa wants to go on dates with him, and cuddle with him, and cook him dinner, and hold him as they drift off to sleep together after a hard shift; he wants lazy morning sex, and walks along the river, and to talk about his past and to just be there for him. 

He wants a future with Hongjoong

Seonghwa encircles his arms around Hongjoong’s small frame, holding him close as the nurse gets used to the intrusion. He buries his nose in Hongjoong’s hair, just breathing in his scent and feeling their hearts pounding against each other until Hongjoong pulls back and looks up at him.

The sight of him makes Seonghwa breathless. His face is glowing, and his eyes are glossy with unshed tears. 

_He’s so beautiful_.

“You can move now,” Hongjoong says, swirling his hips in small circles. Each miniscule movement causes the vice grip Hongjoong’s hole as on his cock to become tighter and tighter, punching a wanton moan from his throat.

“Hongjoong, baby,” Seonghwa pants. “You’re so fucking tight. If you keep moving like that I’m going to cum.”

He’s sure his face is red from the exertion of holding back, but Hongjoong doesn’t seem to care as he continues his fluid movements on.

“That’s okay,” he whispers back against Seonghwa’s lips. “Wanna make you feel good.”

“You do- fuck- you’re making me feel so good right now, love,” Seonghwa murmurs, finally thrusting shallowing upward into Hongjoong’s wet heat. It’s maddening how well Hongjoong takes him, the tight muscles sucking him back in each time he pulls away. 

“God, Hongjoong, you feel so fucking good.” 

The whine falls from Seonghwa’s lips before he can stop it, and he buries his face into Hongjoong’s heaving chest in embarrassment. He can feel the giggle Hongjoong let’s out as he holds him closer than he thought possible, drowning in complete bliss.

This moment, here with Hongjoong… it’s perfect. And he never wants it to end.

“I never want this to end, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa confesses. Again he’s taken aback by the fact that his body and brain have completely betrayed him, but he _doesn’t care_. 

“I want you. Now, six months from now, maybe even years from now,” he rambles on unabashedly, raising his head and resting his chin against Hongjoong’s sternum, gazing up at the man as if in a trance. 

“Be mine, Hongjoong.”

Hongjoong stares back, eyes wide and mouth agape in disbelief. His perfect pink lips struggle to form the right word and Seonghwa can feel his fingers tremble where they’re clutching at his shoulders.

“W-what? What do you mean, Seonghwa?” he stutters, voice hoarse and cautious.

“I want you to be mine, Hongjoong. Be my boyfriend. Please,” Seonghwa says. His hands wander beneath the sweater and begin to trace small circles into Hongjoong’s hip bone in what he hopes is a reassuring gesture.

“O- oh my goodness,” Hongjoong huffs out. “I- yes. Yes.”

“Yes?” Seonghwa’s heart rises into his throat as he yanks his arms from under the sweater to cup Hongjoong’s face.

“Yes.” This time Hongjoong says it with a blinding smile, and Seonghwa swears he’s never been happier in his life. He can feel the tears already springing to his eyes and they begin to laugh. It’s a deep, joyful sound that arises from their very cores as they embrace and bask in each other.

Seonghwa pushes Hongjoong onto his back, moving into him slowly, savouring every moment he’s engulfed by Hongjoong. The man beneath him raises his legs and locks his ankles behind Seonghwa’s back, pulling him impossibly closer. Their hands tangle against the sheets by Hongjoong’s head, finger’s intertwined in a lover’s hold.

Seonghwa kisses Hongjoong _hard_ , swallowing all of Hongjoong’s whimpers as he hits his sweet spot over and over and over. When Hongjoong cums, it’s with a silent cry, his hand grabbing blindly for Seonghwa and pulling him down against his chest as his body shudders, wave after wave of pleasure hitting him so intensely that he feels like he’s drowning in it.

The undulating waves of muscle squeezing Seonghwa’s cock and milking it for all it’s worth is what causes him to tip over the edge, following right after Hongjoong. He spills into Hongjoong, the sticky cum spilling out around his tight hole as Seonghwa continues to thrust into him weakly.

They lay like that afterward, covered in sweat and cum, running their hands up and down the other’s spent body. As Hongjoong begins to drift off, Soenghwa pulls him close against his chest, and it feels as if he’s slotting together two pieces of a puzzle. 

A perfect fit.

ooooo 

When Hongjoong reaches the cozy comfort of his home well into the next afternoon, his body is sore and covered in love bites and scratch marks- evidence of all the times Seonghwa wanted to “make it official”.

He throws his jacket in the closet, shaking his head and smiling fondly at the memory of Seonghwa grinning over him, eyes crinkling in unadulterated happiness as they made love over and over, basking in each other. When it came time to go home, untangling from Seonghwa’s long arms and legs felt almost painful, the warmth seeping from his body almost instantly. Seonghwa had held him against the door, kissing his breath away until his legs felt unsteady and his head was spinning with delight. 

His elation still hasn’t faded even after the twenty minute drive home, and he doubted it would anytime soon. 

A hot shower soothes some of the aching in his muscles, and as he dries off his hair and brushes his teeth, Hongjoong admires the blossoming red and purple marks across his torso. Soon he’s bundled up in his warm comforter, pulling out his phone to text Wooyoung. A familiar name in his notifications catches his eyes, and he presses on it excitedly.

**[From: Hwa ❤️]**

**_I miss you already_ ** **😥**

Hongjoong beams at the four short words, heart racing as he types a reply. It’s been years since his last official relationship and _damn_ it feels good. Seonghwa is kind and selfless and gorgeous, and he chose _Hongjoong_. Lucky doesn’t even begin to describe how he’s feeling.

After a quick exchange with Seonghwa, Hongjoong opens his messages with Wooyoung, typing in just two words: “Call me.”

It isn’t a minute later than Hongjoong phone is buzzing in his hand, Wooyoung’s name glaring at him in bright white script at the top of the screen. He swipes to accept the call and Wooyoung’s voice begins to blare from the speakers before he can even greet his friend.

“What happened?!” Wooyoung all but screeches at him through the line. “Is there some sort of emergency, hyung?!”

Hongjoong chuckles. “No, no emergency Woo. Just wanted to tell you something.”

Wooyoung sighs so heavily that Hongjoong can hear the loud puff of breath punch out his friend's chest. 

“Oh, thank god,” Wooyoung mutters. “Well, what did you have to tell me that was so important that you nearly scared me half to death?”

Hongjoong remains silent. The words are on the tip of his tongue, but it’s the first time he’s saying it aloud to someone who isn’t Seonghwa. It’s nerve-wracking; telling Wooyoung, saying the words and putting it out into the universe, makes it _real_. It’s simultaneously exhilarating and terrifying, and it makes the depths of Hongjoong’s belly twist and curl with anticipation. 

But this is _Wooyoung_ , his very best friend. The friend who knows his sordid dating history and who offers him advice and comfort whenever a date ends badly; the friend who will support Wooyoung no matter what.

Hongjoong clears his throat and finally says the words. “Seonghwa asked me to be his boyfriend… and I said yes.”

The other end of the line is painfully silent, not even the sound of Wooyoung’s breathing audible through the phone. Hongjoong waits and waits, listening for some kind of indication that Wooyoung is, in fact, still listening.  
“Woo, are you th-” he starts.  
“Oh my God!” Wooyoung squeals. “I can’t believe it, hyung! Oh my GOD! I’m so so so happy for you, you don’t even know.” He sounds breathless and in disbelief, but still genuinely happy, and it makes a grin split across Hongjoong’s face. The weight that was on his chest lifts and he feels a thousand times lighter, a giggle falling from his lips involuntarily. 

Wooyoung giggles back, and Hongjoong giggles a little more, and in no time the two are falling into a full blown fit of laughter, the pure, unbridled joy palpable in the air.

“I can’t believe you have a _boyfriend_ , Joongie hyung,” Wooyoung breathes once the two catch their breath. 

“Me, neither,” Hongjoong admits, a wide smile still plastered on his face. He falls back against his pillow, star-fishing in his bed with his phone pressed against his ear. 

“So, how did he ask? Was it some big romantic gesture? Did he get down on one knee?” Wooyoung teases.

“Uh, no, nothing like that,” Hongjoong says quietly, a red flush making its way up his neck as he thinks back to the moment Seonghwa made Hongjoong his. 

“Well, tell me everything!”

“It’s kinda embarrassing,” Hongjoong whines, free hand coming up instinctively to cover his face. 

“I still wanna know!” Wooyoung insists, mirth lacing his voice. 

“Okay, well… we had just woken up, and we were… y’know…” he trails off, sighing resolutely.

 _Might as well come out with it._  
“We were having sex, and I was sitting in his lap, and he just asked me,” Hongjoong says. “It came literally out of nowhere, but for some reason it just felt perfect, and I said yes. And then we had a lot more sex.” 

“He asked you while you were having sex?” Wooyoung questions.

“Yep.”

“He asked you to be his _boyfriend_ while he was _balls deep_ in you,” Wooyoung’s tone is disbelieving.

“That is correct.”

“... I hate men.”

Hongjoong bursts out in laughter, Wooyoung joining him immediately, his high-pitched snickers ringing through the line. Hearing it outloud admittedly makes the whole situation seem ridiculous, but it really was perfect in Hongjoong’s eyes.

“I really am happy for you, hyung,” Wooyoung confesses in between giggles. “I can’t believe you’re officially taken!”

“Me, neither,” Hongjoong sighs contentedly. “I have a boyfriend. An actual boyfriend.”

“Wild.”

“It is, isn’t it?”

A comfortable silence settles over them as everything sinks in. Hongjoong has a real-life, living and breathing _boyfriend_. Life is good.

“So, how are things with you and San?” Even mentioning the doctor’s name leaves a sour taste in Hongjoong’s mouth. He’s remained as insufferable as the day they first met, but Wooyoung seems happy, so Hongjoong has reserved his comments and resorted to huffing and puffing whenever he was around. 

Wooyoung has definitely picked up on his blatant dislike for San, but it hasn’t stopped him from continuing this relationship with him- if it could even be called that. 

His friend lets out a lengthy breath before replying. “Things have been okay.”

“Just okay?”

“Just okay.”

“I thought things were good, not just okay,” Hongjoong questions, turning onto his stomach and resting his chin on his hand. The inflection in Wooyoung’s voice sounds heavy now, the amusement they’d shared dissipating from him completely.

“Things were good… until they weren’t,” Wooyoung murmurs. Hongjoong remains quiet, allowing his friend to speak at his own pace. Wooyung continues after a beat.

“Don’t get me wrong, hyung, San hasn’t hurt me or anything. It’s just that ever since we started sleeping together, everything seems to be about sex,” he explains. “In the beginning, we used to go on actual dates- amazing dates! And now he just comes over after a shift, and we get through dinner and maybe half a movie before he’s ready to get in the bedroom. It’s just- it’s so frustrating…” Wooyoung whispers. 

Hongjoong hums his acknowledgment, but he still doesn’t speak. After another moment, Wooyoung continues.

“I want what you have, hyung,” Wooyoung chokes out, voice thick with tears. “I want him to be my boyfriend.” 

Hongjoong reacts then, cooing reassurances to Wooyoung over the sound of his friend silently sobbing. He _knew_ that San would hurt his friend like this and he can’t help but see red while listening to his friend cry pitifully over him. The next time he saw that snarky, piece-of-shit doctor he was definitely going to give him a piece of his mind.

“Wooyoung,” Hongjoong pleads. “Listen to me. You are worth _so_ much more than what he’s giving you. You deserve the whole fucking world. And if he doesn’t want to give that to you, then you know what you gotta do? You have to move on to the next. It’s gonna hurt like hell, but trust me Woo, one day you’re going to meet a great guy who treats you like royalty and not like a long-term booty call. And you of all people _deserve_ that.”

Wooyungs cries have quieted down to soft hiccups. 

“I know I deserve more,” Wooyoung’s voice is so hoarse and quiet that Hongjoong can barely hear him. “But I don’t want to end things just yet, hyung. Maybe he’ll come around…”

Hongjoong sighs. “Wooyoung, I don’t thi-”

“There’s a chance, hyung,” Wooyoung says, almost as if he’s begging with Hongjoong to agree with him. 

“Woo, as your friend, I think that you should just end things now,” Hongjoong tells him. That is the truth, and Wooyoung needs to hear it. “Clearly he doesn’t value you in the way you deserve.”

“I want to give him one more chance, hyung. Just one more,” Wooyoung sniffles. 

“I- okay, Wooyoung. I don’t like it, but okay,” Hongjoong concedes.

“Okay?”

“Okay. But if he continues to treat you like crap, then I’m gonna come over there and break up with him for you. That’s a promise.” 

Wooyoung chuckles wetly. “I expect nothing less, hyung.”

Another comfortable silence falls over the two of them as Hongjoong listens to Wooyoung’s breathing slowly calm down. 

“I wonder what Dr. Min is gonna say when he hears that you’re dating one of his doctors,” Wooyoung says amusedly. 

“HA! Dr. Min isn’t gonna know.” Hongjoong replies. “In fact, no one's gonna know. Y’know, HR and all that.

“No one at all?”

“Not a soul. Just you.”

“So I’m assuming I can’t tell San,” Wooyoung probes. 

“You assume correctly,” Hongjoong agrees. “I mean, he’s friends with Seonghwa, so if he chooses to tell San- great. But he isn’t gonna hear it from me or you.” 

Hongjoong mutters a soft “fuck that guy” under his breath that he’s fairly sure that Wooyoung hears, but his friend doesn’t comment on it. 

Their conversation devolves into talking about everything but work and boys, and they finally hang up two hours later. Hongjoong is exhausted from the conversation and his _activities_ earlier with Seonghwa, so he allows himself to drift off, already thinking about when he’ll get to see his boyfriend next.

ooooo

Their first month as an _official_ couple flies by in no time. It’s filled with amazing dates and late-night movie sessions; longing glances from across the ER and stolen kisses in the supply closet. Seonghwa is happier than he ever thought possible. Hongjoong has some sort of magical effect on him. Whenever he looks at him, it’s like the rest of the world melts away and all that’s there is the two of them. And, God, when he smiles? It sends the biggest rush of serotonin through his body, flooding all of his senses with a warm, fuzzy feeling. 

Yunho and San don’t know, of course. They’ve kept mum about it from the rest of the staff at work, and the only other person that is aware of their relationship is Wooyoung. San is still pitifully stringing the unsuspecting nurse along, but their meet-ups have been few and far between in the past two weeks. Seonghwa assumes it has something to do with the starry-eyed look Wooyoung gets whenever San so much as looks at him.

The four of them are working a day shift this time, and it feels so different not seeing Hongjoong outlined in the dimmed lights of the nursing station. Instead, everything is bright and loud, the ER bustling with patients and staff alike.

It’s difficult to get a moment alone with him, their only time spent together on this shift involving direct care of patients. It’s a non-stop barrage of bumped heads and DIY construction projects gone wrong all the way until lunch, which is when Yunho whisks them away to the cafeteria to try what he’s heard is “life-altering” falafel. 

When they come back from their break, the ER has calmed down, and only one patient is left in the waiting room. One dermatology consult later, the patient is walking out the door and an eerie silence settles over the unit. The nurses are seated in various corners of the station, scribbling away in patient folders and calling doctors, and San takes the opportunity to drag Seonghwa into the deserted supply closet.

Seonghwa turns to San the moment the door clicks shut and sighs through his nose. 

“What do you want?” he says, exasperated.

“I’m here to tell you that you get to be let off the hook soon,” San grins mischievously, clapping Seonghwa on the shoulder.

“Wait, what?” Seonghwa questions. “What do you mean ‘let off the hook’?” 

“With Hongjoong!” San says, bouncing up and down excitedly.

“Oh, right, the favour,” Seonghwa mutters. He hopes he sounds calm because his mind is racing a mile a minute. He hadn’t expected this day to come so soon, but he supposed it had to come eventually.

“Yeah, Wooyoung was getting too attached,” San grumbles. “Everytime I wanted to fuck, he wanted to cuddle, so I’m done. Onto the next!” San winks at him, and Seonghwa feels a shudder crawl down his spine. He loves San, but that doesn’t change the fact that his friend is a gigantic sleazeball.

San has no clue that Seonghwa has developed real feelings for Hongjoong. He never mentioned the nurse to San unless his friend was asking him to distract him for the day. Never did he think he would have to explain that he’s fallen deeply and undeniably in lov-

_Oh no._

The force of his realization hits him as if he’d just run full speed into a brick wall. The L-word. He was about to use the L-word. 

Love.

 _He loves Hongjoong_.

There’s no way this can end now, not like this. Seonghwa’s heart pounds in his chest like a hammer as he steels his resolve. He has to tell San- now. Hopefully it’ll prompt San to let Wooyoung down a little easier than he’s let down past partners, and hopefully that will minimize the damage done to his relationship with Hongjoong.

One thing is for sure, though: there is absolutely no way in hell that Hongjoong can find out about the favour. 

“San, I need to tell you something,” Seonghwa chokes out, voice hoarse. His friend has made his way to the far corner of the supply closet, inspecting a 60cc syringe. He holds it out to Seonghwa. 

“Hey hyung, what do you think would happen if I filled this up with lube?”

“What- no, San, _pay attention_ ,” Seonghwa groans out. “I need to talk to you. About Hongjoong.”

“What about him?” San inquires, lazily swinging the syringe by the plunger. “He was still a colossal stick in the mud the last I spoke to him.”

Seonghwa rolls his eyes so hard it gives him a slight headache. “First of all, stop insulting him- he’s not a bad person. Not by a long shot. And second… Hongjoong and I are-”

Seonghwa is cut off by the blaring alarms of sirens. The telltale screech of tires is audible through the metal door, as is the stampede of footsteps as every available staff member rushes to the ER doors. Seonghwa and San exchange a frenzied glance before wrenching open the door and grabbing gowns, joining the small crowd gathered around the three ambulances parked outside. 

Patient vitals and current status are being yelled out by paramedics to the nurses and doctors as they rush them into the trauma rooms. Seonghwa loses sight of San as he charges into a room, and his mind clears as he inspects the patient laid out on the bed. 

Dr. Min looks up at him as he shuts the door behind him.  
“Ah, Dr. Park, thank you for joining us,” Dr. Min says, clapping his hands together.

“Of course, Dr. Min,” Seonghwa acknowledges, throwing a mask over his face before snapping on a pair of gloves. The older doctor’s eyes crinkle as he observes Seonghwa standing at the ready, and he nods his head ever so slightly in satisfaction.

“It’s a beautiful day to save lives, people. Let’s get started.”

ooooo

Seonghwa sits down after what feels like days, ankles sore and crying out in protest as he rolls them in small circles. San and Yunho are in a similar position, sprawled out in available chairs with various, unused equipment peeking out from the overstuffed pockets of their white coats. The nurses are scattered throughout the nursing station catching their breath and documenting. Seonghwa catches Hongjoong guzzling water from his comically big water bottle, holding a chart up high with his free hand as his eyes zig-zag across the page. 

He tosses the chart aside after a moment and skitters off to check on the now stabilized patients, Seonghwa watching idly as he checks and re-checks vitals, notes down pain scores and injects painkillers. He’s been on his feet as long as Soenghwa has, but he doesn’t show a hint of the same fatigue. Seonghwa supposes it comes from the past two years of ER and trauma experience as he observes Hongjoong’s practiced and precise movements. 

San yawns next to him, effectively breaking his concentration and garnering his attention. The man is stretched out, arms raised high above his head and toes pointed. His limbs fall back down in a limp heap as he rolls his neck, the cracking audible as stiff muscles get a good stretch.

“Well, that was exhausting,” San deadpans, his voice tired and hoarse. 

“My brain hurts from thinking too hard,” Yunho mutters back. His eyes are shut and Seonghwa would have thought he was asleep had he not spoken.

“I can’t believe our first major trauma case was a multiple MVA,” Seonghwa replies. “I never thought I’d see a flail chest two months into internship.” 

Luckily, all of their patients had survived, but more than one had to be sent to the ICU. It was an enormous team effort to stabilize everyone that came in through the trauma bay doors, but they _did it_ , and it was exhilarating. The rush of adrenaline that came with fixing a broken body was dizzying, addictive even. Even now Seonghwa can feel the fading effects of the catecholamines in the very tips of his fingers, the vessels within pulsing with every pump of his heart. 

Dr. Min scurries up to them then, seemingly from nowhere, holding a pile of charts in his arms. 

“Okay, interns! Let’s go and update these charts so we can send these patients off to the appropriate units!”

 _And there goes the adrenaline_. 

The older man gives each of them a handful of charts and they get to work. The words are jumping off the pages and floating in front of Seonghwa’s eyes as the fatigue falls upon him like a ton of bricks but they power through.

In an hour and a half or so, the charts are done, the patients are being discharged to various units and the three of them are utterly exhausted. If it wasn’t the end of their shift, Seonghwa is sure he would have passed out the moment his head hit the lumpy pillows in the on-call room, which in any other situation are completely impossible to fall asleep on. 

Dr. Min happily lets them go and bids them farewell as they trudge to the locker room, half-asleep already. 

“Hey, hyung-” San starts.  
“No,” Seonghwa cuts him off. 

“You don’t even know what I was gonna say!” San protests with as much energy he can muster. Yunho only watches, trailing behind his friends like a zombie, chocolate brown irises lit up by the glare of his phone which is buzzing _incessantly_ , but neither man pays any mind to it as San continues to pester Seonghwa. 

“I don’t need to know what you were going to say, my answer is no,” Seonghwa sighs. He’s too tired to deal with San and his problems right now. All he wants to do is sleep, preferably cuddled up against a certain nurse.

“Okay, fine, then I’m taking Yunho to the party and leaving you behind,” San says resolutely, even going so far as to cross his arms in front of his chest like a toddler. 

“Oooh, what party?” Yunho unhelpfully pipes up, slipping his phone into his pocket as he punches in the code for the locker room. San raises a brow at Seonghwa teasingly, swinging the door open a little harder than necessary as they make their way to their respective lockers. There is a lone intern or two still hanging around, but most have already left or started their night shift, leaving the room effectively deserted.

“I heard the nurses talking in the break room before we left,” San explains, pulling his scrubs over his head. Seonghwa notes that he’s beefed up a bit since he last saw his friend shirtless. The lines of his back are defined, and there are fresh nail marks all along his shoulder blades. His clavicle is sporting more than one dark hickey, which had been haphazardly covered up by cheap concealer, and his pecs are lined with more scratch marks.

Seonghwa’s attention is drawn back to San’s rambling as he yanks on a sweater, the sound muffled beneath the thick material. 

“They’re planning on having a small party, and I managed to secure the address,” San carries on, turning to a mirror to fix his now-staticky hair. 

“I still don’t want to go,” Seonghwa huffs as he tosses his sneakers in this locker and laces up his combat boots. 

“C’mon hyung, it’ll be fun,” San whines petulantly. “I even heard Hongjoong is gonna be there.” 

Seonghwa hesitates as his boyfriend’s name falls from his friend’s lips, and San pumps a fist in silent victory, already knowing Seonghwa is going to give in.

“When you say you ‘secured’ the address…” Seonghwa starts. San gives him a pointed look and shrugs his shoulders. 

“I flirted with the nurse who’s hosting, no big deal.”

“So you invited yourself.”

“No, she invited us.”

“After you invited yourself.”

“Just go with it, hyung! It’s a party! Let loose! We sure as hell deserve it after today,” San pushes his locker shut, the metallic _clang_ resonating in the empty room. 

Yunho follows suit, shouldering his bag and zipping up his fuzzy jacket. “I have to agree with him, hyung. What’s the harm?” 

Yunho’s nonchalant demeanor convinces Seonghwa slightly. It is a small gathering after all, and it’ll be nice to spend that time with Hongjoong. All the nurses they work with are nice enough, and as long as San behaves himself, it should be just like any other fun night out with his friends.

Begrudgingly Seonghwa agrees, San clapping him on the back and already making plans for whose place they’re going to get ready at. As they walk to the parkade and head their separate ways, a sense of dread settles itself deep in Seonghwa’s belly.

ooooo

The so-called “small gathering” that weekend turns out to be a massive party only one step down from what could qualify as a rager. They pull up fashionably late to a house, cars already lined up like ants up and down the street. There are lights flashing in the windows, and Soenghwa can feel the thumping of the bass beneath his feet as they clamber onto the porch. 

The air outside is cold now that winter is steadily approaching, making their breath puff out in silvery-white clouds. The moment they open the door, however, a gust of heat washes over them, fuelled by dozens of bodies packed shoulder-to-shoulder, gyrating and twisting on a makeshift dance floor. 

San’s eyes crinkle as he soaks it in- he looks at home here, among a mass of inebriated bodies. It takes Seonghwa back to their college days, when he would nurse a rum and coke all night while San and Yunho took shot after shot. 

Yunho takes off right away to the kitchen, where bottles are lined up on the counter. There’s a couple of people standing around that Seonghwa recognizes, but he hasn’t seen Hongjoong just yet. He looks around, skimming the faces in the living room for a glimpse of the familiar midnight blue hair and moonlit smile to no avail. 

San interrupts his search by shoving a small plastic shot glass into his hand, followed by a slice of lime.

“Tequila? Seriously?” Seonghwa questions as San searches the cupboards for some salt. He makes a noise of victory as he finds what he’s looking for. 

“Yes, seriously,” he replies as he pours some salt onto a napkin. Yunho happily sprinkles some on his hand, lime pinched between his fingers and his other hand clutching the shot.

He crinkles his nose at the smell of the strong alcohol, only giving in when his friends look at him expectantly, their shots already prepared. When Seonghwa finally lines some salt on his hand, Yunho counts to three and they toss it back. 

Seonghwa cringes as he sucks on the lime, the alcohol still burning as it slithers down his throat. San and Yunho have no reaction to the acrid taste, already moving to fill bigger cups with their favourite concoctions. 

“You want anything, hyung?” Yunho asks over his shoulder, and Seonghwa shakes his head. Instead he grabs a soda from the cooler pressed into the corner next to the counter-turned-bar, already knowing he’s going to have to be the sober one tonight.

They move to the living room, San immediately moving to joining the mass of writhing bodies on the dance floor. Yunho taps Seonghwa on the shoulder, and he looks back in time to see him disappear through the glass doors to the backyard, a peculiar smell permeating the room as the door slides shut behind him. 

He manages to find an empty spot on the couch, which had been shoved out of the way of the dance floor. From here, he can see San laughing with a nurse Songhwa recognizes, a hand placed a little too low on her back. That must be the host that San had to flirt with, Seonghwa supposes; he feels a little better about crashing her party now, since it seems like all the hospital staff have turned up and crammed themselves into the house.

From the corner of his eye, he sees the front door swing open. Hongjoong and Wooyoung step in, and Seonghwa’s mouth runs dry at the sight of his boyfriend.

His slightly longer hair is swept up and off his forehead, and he’s wearing makeup- probably Wooyoung’s doing. The smokey eye on Hongjoong makes his gaze sultry, and the gloss on his lips makes Seonghwa want to kiss him until his mouth is pink and swollen.

Seonghwa stands up when he sees Hongjoong scanning the room, pushing through the crowd to get in his line of sight. When their eyes finally meet, Hongjoong beams and it makes Seonghwa’s heart patter in his chest like a drum. 

Wooyoung raises a hand in greeting as he pulls Hongjoong in for a hug. He so badly wants to kiss his boyfriend, but he knows he can’t and it kills him. All he wants to do is draw Hongjoong into his arms and hold him for the world to see. 

Hongjoong stands on his toes, speaking into Seonghwa’s ear over the pounding music. “How long have you been here?” he asks.

“Not long,” Seonghwa replies. “I’ve been waiting for you.”

Hongjoong smiles sweetly at Seonghwa’s words, his hand sneaking down to tangle with Seonghwa’s fingers in what he hopes is a subtle manner. Wooyoung watches the exchange with an unamused look on his face, but his eyes tell a different story as he looks between the two of them with fondness and longing. 

Seonghwa looks away from Hongjoong as Wooyoung clears his throat. 

“I think I’m going to get a drink,” he practically shouts over the music. 

“Oh, that sounds like a good idea!” Hongjoong says. “I’ll be right back.” 

He squeezes Seonghwa’s hand before trailing behind Wooyoung to the kitchen. The moment he leaves Seonghwa’s sight, he feels a sweaty hand grab his wrist, dragging him towards the staircase. He sees San’s visage as the shifting lights land on his face as they move up to the second floor. The music is quieter here, and he can hear San without having to strain his hearing. 

“San, what’s the matter?” Seonghwa questions. His friend’s face is flushed red and his hair is plastered to his forehead, but his gaze is cunning. San pushes open the door to a random room, pulling Seonghwa inside and shutting it behind them. 

“I have a plan to break-up with Wooyoung.” 

ooooo

By the time Wooyoung and Hongjoong walk out of the kitchen with beers in hand, Seonghwa has disappeared. Wooyoung doesn’t seem to notice as he pulls Hongjoong into the throng of bodies, losing himself to the music. Hongjoong sways with him, sipping on the cool liquid as his skin quickly becomes slick with a thin layer of sweat. It’s been a while since he’s been in a scene like this, but Wooyoung looks more than comfortable, smiling and laughing with their co-workers, grinding up against them teasingly and dancing to the addictive beat. 

The host sidles up next to them, throwing her arms around the pair as she giggles. Hongjoong can smell the alcohol on her breath, but he hardly cares as she begins showering them with compliments. 

“Oh my God, you guys look so _good_ ,” she exclaims. “You should wear your hair like this more often Hongjoong, it’s fucking hot.”

Hongjoong would have blushed had his face not already been flushed from the alcohol. 

“Thanks, Soojin,” Hongjoong chortles, slipping a hand around her waist when she tips too far to one side.

“The doctors look hot too,” she slurs. “I know he has no ass, but _damn_ I could stare Dr. Park’s thighs all day in those tight-ass jeans he was wearing.” Soojin sighs dreamily, pressing a hand to her chest dramatically. Hongjoong grins internally.

 _If only she knew how good those thighs look with nothing covering them_.

“Oh, you saw Dr. Park?” Hongjoong asks. 

She nods dazedly. “Yeah, I saw him go upstairs with Dr. Choi like two minutes ago.”

Hongjoong looks up the staircase, which is empty save for a pair of drunk girls sitting at the base, leaning against each other for support. The hallway at the top is devoid of any movement too. He figures that they must have gone into one of the rooms. 

Soojin slides away from Hongjoong, throwing her hands in the air and whooping as she goes to greet someone else, drink sloshing precariously in her hand. Wooyoung looks at him, a single brow cocked in questioning. Hongjoong gives him a nod and inclines his head toward the staircase. 

They meander to the stairs together, climbing up quickly. The hallway upstairs only stretches out in one direction, so they wander further down, listening briefly through the wooden doors for any signs of activity. 

The first two doors are written off quickly at the sound of creaking bed springs and muffled moaning; Hongjoong and Wooyoung chuckle as they walk by, amused. The last door, at the very end of the hallway is the only one left, and this far away from the center of activity downstairs, Wooyoung and Hongjoong can hear each other easily. They can also hear the raised voices of whoever is inside. 

Hongjoong immediately recognizes the cadence of Seonghwa’s voice despite how muted it sounds through the solid material of the door. San’s voice carries over soon after, Wooyoung eyes widening as they press their ears to the door.

Hongjoong knows in the back of his mind that this is a gross invasion of privacy, but with the way they sound, he wouldn’t be surprised if the two men inside the room came to exchanging blows.

He’d never heard Seonghwa sound this angry before; they’d never gotten into a major argument in the time they’ve been together. Hearing his tone carry this much venom is so jarring it takes Hongjoong a moment to tune into what they’re actually saying.

“I’m not breaking up with him, San,” Seonghwa spits out. Hongjoong feels his heart drop right into his stomach. Why would San be trying to convince Seonghwa to break up with him? Hongjoong didn’t even know Seonghwa had shared their relationship status with him. 

“Why the fuck not?! It’s not like you actually like him!” San shoots back. Wooyoung’s eyes dart to his, panic flooding his gaze. “You only got with him because I asked you to get him out of my way so I could fuck Wooyoung in peace! Don’t tell me actually fell for him in two fucking months.”

Hongjoong can hear his heart pound in his ears, and his mouth goes dry. 

“I know! I know I only asked him out as a favour to you, and I didn’t expect to actually like him,” Seonghwa sounds defeated. “But I do. I couldn't help it. And I refuse to let go of the first good relationship I’ve had in years just because you’re done with Wooyoung!”

It’s Hongjoong turn to turn his wide-eyed gaze towards his friend. Wooyoung is pale and trembling slightly; when Hongjoong looks down he can see Wooyoung’s fist clenched so tightly that his nails leave little crescent-shaped marks on his palm.

“All I’m saying is that it’s better to end things now before Hongjoong finds out your whole relationship has been fake-”

“It wasn’t fake!”

“So you’re telling me that you asked Hongjoong out of your own interest?! You only did that because I _asked_ you. And every date after that.”

“That is a _lie_.”

“Whatever, hyung. I’m just suggesting that you get yourself out of whatever it is that you and Hongjoong have going on and move on! We have no use for them now, anyhow. Wooyoung’s become way too emotional and clingy, and if Hongjoong is anything like that, you better get outta there fast; move on, like I did.”

“I’m not doing it, San,” Seonghwa asserts firmly. Hongjoong can imagine the way his strong jaw is set in his stubbornness, an angry flush of red dusting his cheeks. The image is so beautiful, but it only serves to break his heart into tiny pieces. 

Wooyoung is no better off, fat tears rolling down his ruddy cheeks as he stifles his sobs with a fist pressed against his mouth. 

“He’s not gonna wanna have anything to do with you once I cut things off with Wooyoung, anyways. Just bite the fucking bullet, hyung,” San argues defiantly. 

“ _No \_ ,” Seonghwa bites back, the finality in his tone palpable. 

“It’s your loss, hyung,” San concedes as heavy footsteps rush towards the door. He and Wooyoung only have a moment to react and jump out of the way as the door swings open roughly. 

It’s Seonghwa, mouth set in a frown and brows furiously furrowed. The moment his eyes lock with Hongjoong’s, his face falls, despair flooding his visage. Just behind him, Hongjoong can see San lounging on the bed in the middle of the room. His shirt has a low cut, and the glaring hickey on his collarbone is on full display. 

Hongjoong knows Wooyoung sees it; he and San haven’t slept together in about a week, so there’s no way it was his doing. His friend’s breaths quicken and the sobs finally wrench themselves free. Wooyoung rushes past him and down the stairs, and Hongjoong can do nothing to stop him. He’s held in place by Seonghwa’s desperate face, his full, pink lips trying to form words to explain what Hongjoong had just overheard, but coming up short. 

Hongjoong turns his back as Seonghwa’s eyes begin to fill with tears, walking away as quickly as he can. Each step feels incredibly heavy, like a weight has been attached to each of his ankles. 

His own tears burn in his eyes, threatening to spill over; his entire body just _hurts_ from the depths of his belly to the tips of his toes. 

Hongjoong rushes down the stairs, clutching the railing for dear life. He can hear Seonghwa’s footfalls behind him distinctly, but the sound of them fade out as the music becomes overwhelming loud once again. Wooyoung is nowhere to be seen but the front door stands open, cool air rushing in and washing over the boiling space. 

Hongjoong feels like he’s drowning; like a colossal wave has just crashed over his head, pulling him under. The tide has him in it’s clutches, holding him in place and robbing him of the ability to breathe. His body trembles with the cold and with the pain as he stumbles out the door.

Sure enough, he can see Wooyoung’s figure down the street, heading to where he’d parked his car when they’d first arrived. 

Hongjoong is halfway down the driveway when Seonghwa’s pained cry rips through the air.

“Hongjoong, wait! Please!” It’s a pathetic plea, and Hongjoong wants nothing more than to get away from him as soon as he can, but his body betrays him and his pace slows, allowing Seonghwa to catch up to him as they reach the street.

The first tear falls when he looks at Seonghwa’s face. The man he thought was his boyfriend is crying freely, streams of tears trailing over his sharp cheekbones and dripping from the point of his chin. 

Hongjoong is tired of holding back the tears, so he lets them fall freely too. The wind nips at his warm face, turning the warm droplets icy cold.

“I can explain, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa pleads, voice hoarse. Hongjoong just stares at him silently, neither encouraging him nor barring him from continuing. 

“What San said, it wasn’t true.” His voice cracks and his lips tremble. Hongjoong wants to kiss his pain away.

“So you didn’t ask me out as a favour to him, then?” Hongjoong’s voice is surprisingly steady despite the overbearing anguish that has his heart in it’s clutches. 

Seonghwa is silent, lips pressed together as he wipes the tears from his face. 

“That’s what I thought,” Hongjoong says weakly, turning away from Seonghwa.

A hand quickly comes down on his shoulder, stopping him. Seonghwa’s warmth is searing through the layers of Hongjoong’s clothing, and he wants so badly to lean into the touch, but instead he freezes and waits. 

Waits for anything that bears some semblance to an explanation. 

“The first date, yes. I did it as a favour to San. But every other date was real. My feelings for you are _real_ , Hongjoong,” Seonghwa sobs. “I don’t want to lose you, please,” he begs feebly. 

“How can I trust you after this, Seonghwa?” Hongjoong whispers. “How can I know for sure that what you’re saying is true when this relationship started based on a lie? A _trick_?” 

“I don’t know what to do, Hongjoong.” Seonghwa sounds so broken. Hongjoong feels his hand slip form his shoulders, and then a dull thud. When he looks back, he sees Seonghwa on his knees, face pressed into his palms. “Tell me what to do Hongjoong. Tell me how to make this better, _please_. I don’t want to lose you.” 

Seonghwa’s despondent pleading is almost enough to make Hongjoong’s own knees buckle. Almost, but not quite enough. 

“I’m tired, Seonghwa. I don’t want to be used anymore. There’s nothing you can say or do right now that will make me forget that you played me for your friend’s amusement,” Hongjoong admits. He can feel the truth of his words weigh down on his body. Seonghwa had destroyed him so thoroughly with just a few words.

“We’re done.” Hongjoong’s voice falters then, and the tears begin to fall harder than before. It hurts so, so _bad_. 

He feels like his heart is being ripped from his chest with red-hot claws, and his breathing becomes uneven as he begins to weep unbidden. Hongjoong leaves Seonghwa there, on his knees. The man is staring up at him in disbelief and agony, as if Hongjoong words had cut through him like a knife. 

“No, no, no, Hongjoong _please_ , no,” he wails. “I can’t lose you, please!” Seonghwa’s throaty cries carry with the wind as he walks away. And then he hears it. 

“Hongjoong, please! _I love you_.” 

Hongjoong can hear Seonghwa gasp as he realizes what he’s said. He’s breathing hard, wracked with sobs as he scrambles to his feet.  
“I love you. I _love_ you, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa chokes. 

All of his life, Hongjoong as been waiting to hear these words from a lover. If Seonghwa had said them to him yesterday, he would have been over the fucking moon with joy. 

Now, it feels dirty. Hongjoong feels dirty. The words carry on the wind, empty. It leaves a hollow feeling in Hongjoong’s chest, where his heart used to beat in pure adoration for Seonghwa; now there is only a rhythmic pumping as it beats against Hongjoong’s rib cage.

It’s the only thing reminding him that he’s alive, living his worst nightmare. 

The words mean nothing. He meant nothing. Their time together was _nothing_. 

Hongjoong is numb as he leaves Seonghwa there, stuttering out his admissions of love. The words become distant murmurs, fading out as blood rushes to Hongjoong head, making him dizzy with anguish. 

Then he gets in his car and drives away, Seonghwa’s figure becoming smaller and smaller in the mirror, until it disappears completely.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *wrings hands* so clearly y'all can tell this is my first time even attempting angst  
> Even so, I hope you enjoyed this monster update LOL  
> Comments and kudos are greatly appreciated ❤️  
> Come follow me on twt @useumssi for nonsensical tweets and the occasional meme  
> Until next time! (>‿◠)✌


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